When it comes to exercise, you either love it or you absolutely hate it; there’s really no in between. Some individuals relish in their gym time and excessively post about it on Instagram, while others are sitting at home looking at those posts and thinking about how much better their donut looks compared to how the gym looks.
We totally get it. If you do not like to work out, then hitting the gym can feel like one of the worst types of punishments for all of the indulgent food choices you have been making. Especially now with the holiday season behind us and a pile of New Year’s resolutions looming over us, we feel the pressure to get into shape more than ever. For those that hate the gym, there are so many other things they would rather be doing than getting sweaty…like binge-watching a series on Netflix while stuffing their faces with ice cream and chips. The truth is when you hate the gym, here are a lot of miseries associated with going for a workout (and sore muscles are just the start of it). Here are 15 memes you can likely relate to if you hate the gym (and exercising, in general).
15. Waking up early is 10 times harder when it’s for a workout
It’s bad enough waking up early to go to work, but when you have to set your alarm even earlier to fit in a workout, that is particularly heinous. Most people who hate exercising know that if you do not schedule the gym in the morning, the chances of you going after work are slim to none.
There’s nothing quite as miserable as waking up out of the perfect slumber, only to see that it’s still dark outside. Then, you have to struggle into a pair of tights. On top of that, you need to locate two socks that match (why do socks always go missing after laundry?) and decide if you should have a snack before the gym or go hungry. Of course, if you choose to have a snack then it’s likely you will end up turning that into a full-blown meal and then wind up telling yourself that you will go to the gym tomorrow. Sure you will.
14. Does dressing the part count as a workout?
Why are yoga pants called “yoga pants?” How many people who wear yoga pants actually do yoga? Now we may not know the exact statistics, however, if we had to wager a guess, we’d say that chances are at least half of the people who wear yoga pants do not actually do yoga. Let’s face it—yoga pants should be called “comfortable pants,” “makes my bum look nice pants,” or “makes me look like I worked out pants.” When you first buy a pair of yoga pants, you may very well intend to use them for a workout, but you quickly learn that they are just as handy to wear while watching television, going shopping, going for a meal or taking a nap. What is the best thing about yoga pants, though? The fact that others may be deceived into thinking that you worked out, obviously.
13. The constant battle between eating pizza and being fit
We know Kate Moss once said that “nothing tastes as good as skinny feels,” but seriously has she ever had pizza? We guess not. For the ones who do not like to workout, there is a constant struggle between the desire to be fit and the desire to feel entirely satisfied after eating a whole pizza. Contrary to the meme above, for whatever unfair reason, pizza and fitness do not go hand in hand (most of the time). That is, unless you consider working out and then eating a pizza after logical because pizza has a ton of protein, thanks to the cheese. But, we’re not so sure it works that way. Unfortunately, no matter how we try to spin the nutritional value of pizza, the calories just never quite add up to a fitter you. The bottom line is if you are going to have a pizza then you might as well consider that a cheat day (notice we said “day,” not “week”).
12. Starting a new fitness routine on Monday is a bad idea
While it may seem like a splendid idea to plunge into a new fitness routine on a Monday, the truth is Mondays are bad enough without having to get on a treadmill. Getting to the gym for the first time on a Monday is like going for a walk and attaching heavy weights to your body. What is already a struggle becomes far more strenuous.
While we are not sure how effective crawling on a treadmill is, we may have to try it the next time we decide to go to the gym. If you are determined that this is the year that you will get in shape, then may we suggest you start your plan on a Saturday morning? At least that way you still have two full days of weekend to look forward to and balance out the pain you feel from exercising. Otherwise, if you find yourself at the gym on a Monday, there is no doubt that you will turn around and go home before you even break a sweat…or you will end up crawling.
11. Maintaining your looks while sweating is impossible
Some women look fantastic when they are working out, but no matter how hard you try, it never seems to work out that way. Between the sweat and your lack of enthusiasm towards exercising, you just end up looking like an angry, wet dog. We feel you.
Although going to the gym just to stand around and look good defeats the purpose, you cannot help but envy those women that look flawless while pumping iron or doing cardio. How do they manage to look so put together? Why does their sweat make them look like they’re glowing, while yours make you look like you just battled a hurricane? These are all questions we are trying to find the answers to, but honestly if you do not look good while working out just know that you are not alone. At the end of the day, the aim of the gym is to look good after the gym, so at least you are on the right track.
10. When Nike’s slogan does not apply
Whoever came up with Nike’s famous “Just Do It” slogan has apparently never tried to go to the gym after a night of partying and consuming copious amounts of fast food. Yes, getting a Big Mac, large fries and a large coke seemed like a good idea last night, but now that you’re attempting to work it all off, you realize that it is an impossible feat.
“Just can’t do it” is the slogan that all of us fitness-challenged people feel is a more accurate depiction of our state while at the gym. For starters, getting up and out of bed can be difficult in itself but to then walk or drive to the gym and attempt to do some physical motion? What kind of savage thinks that is a good idea? Why couldn’t the drunk dancing we did the night before count as enough of a workout? Surely, we burn enough calories shaking our hips on the dance floor, to not have to go to the gym the next day?
9. When the gym equipment is too complicated
When you finally do make it to the gym, there is always the possibility that you will have no idea what you are doing. What are all of these machines for? How do they work? More importantly, how do you make them stop? What muscles do they engage? How many calories do they really burn? These are all questions you have probably asked as you stepped foot into the gym for the first time after taking a hiatus. Yes, there are photo descriptions on most of the machines, but if you bothered to read all of them, it would be far too time consuming. So instead of trying to figure out how to use the machines, you just hop on and hope for the best. After all, what is the worst that can happen? You end up straining a muscle and having to take a break from the gym? That doesn’t sound so bad, does it?
8. One training session gives you too much pain to go again
You finally get to the gym after taking a break, only to have to take another break because you did not realize that so many muscles could be sore at once. Who knew that your stomach could hurt in so many different areas? Or that the muscles in your arms, wrists, palms and fingers could experience varying degrees of pain? Or that your neck muscles could get sore from doing squats? Or that the bottoms of your toes could hurt from a workout that you thought would not even affect your feet?
The body and the gym work in mysterious ways. When you’re not an avid exerciser, you quickly learn that there are many ways to hurt yourself. This inevitably leads to you needing to have a rest for a few days. Then, a few days turns into a week and then another week and the cycle repeats itself.
7. When you exercise, it is not pretty
Exercising can take a lot out of a person. So it is no wonder you may prefer it when people do not watch you sweat, grunt and curse at the treadmill as you power through a training session. When it comes to getting your sweat on, any elegance or class you may have possessed goes out the window. Pushing through a workout and feeling like you are about to collapse will bring out the worst in anyone. So do not worry too much if you look like an angry gremlin, at least you are in the gym and getting it done. On the bright side, while it may not be pretty in the moment, at least when you’re done you can relish in the way you feel. Whether we like to admit or not, endorphins are an actual thing.
6. When practice does not make perfect
Who invented the plank? No matter how hard you try to nail it, you still look like a sloppy animal trying to balance while gravity works against you. Although, it can sometimes feel like you are doing it the right way, all it takes is one glimpse in the mirror to see that you are not. On top of that, why is that most exercise classes incorporate planking? Yeah, we get it, it’s supposed to work your whole body, but who has the patience to stay still in a plank for longer than five seconds? Nothing will make your mind wander faster than being stuck in a painful position that you’re told is right for you, despite your doubts. Imagine after all of this time of attempting the plank and doing it wrong that you learn it is not even effective? Don’t worry, we’re sure you are getting some benefit from it even if your idea of a plank is to have your face squished into the floor.
5. When results do not come quick enough
Don’t you hate it when you do five whole crunches and you still do not have abs? Yeah, we know, it’s the worst. Why are six-packs so hard to attain? Also, how do those Instagram fitness models make it look so easy? Like, how do the female fitness bloggers make popping out a baby and maintaining abs look natural, meanwhile we eat one taco (okay, three tacos) and any sign of an ab goes missing. Even though we don’t go to the gym too often, when we do go, we’re sure to position ourselves in front of a mirror just in case we start to make progress. Are you one of those people that post up in front of a mirror no matter where you’re working out? Yeah, we get it. How else are you supposed to remain motivated if you can’t check yourself out as you exercise?
4. When you would rather eat a shoe than do another burpee
Let’s just get this out of the way: burpees are horrible. Not only do you have to put your hands on the dirty floor, but they also involve jumping, balancing and a whole lot of sweating. We’re pretty confident that burpees were first invented as a form of punishment and then one day, some wise guy decided to incorporate them into a workout. Well, no thank you. If we had our way, burpees would be banned. They require far too much effort and leave us feeling sore in places that should never be sore. Not to mention, there is no way of looking cute while performing a burpee. Hair will be flying and nostrils will be flaring. So, if you are trying to impress someone at the gym while doing a burpee, forget it. No way doing a burpee in front of a crush will leave them asking for your number. Burpees are best reserved to be performed in privacy or never.
3. When you get creative with your excuses
If there’s one thing that people who hate going to the gym are good at, it’s making excuses for why they could not make it or why it’s okay that they didn’t make it to the gym. They make excuses such as: “I couldn’t find one of my running shoes,” “I can’t find a hair tie,” “I’m still sore from last month’s workout” and “I got stuck in traffic this morning so I won’t be making it to the gym tonight.” Exercise slackers are also great at justifying why it’s okay to miss the gym. They use sayings such as, “I worked out last week.” Or, “The cashier’s name at Mcdonald’s was Jim. Sooo. Same thing.” Or, “I had to go up two flights of stairs today, and that’s pretty much a workout.”
2. You think losing 1-pound is a huge win
What’s the best way to celebrate after you lose a pound? Naturally, consume a lot of food. After losing one pound, you’re practically skinny so why not treat yourself? At least that’s the reasoning most of us who hate exercise have when it comes to weight loss and rewarding ourselves. What are we supposed to do, reward ourselves with more exercise? That seems counterintuitive. Let’s face it—one of the main reasons we work out is to eat more food and not feel bad about it. So, it’s inevitable that we’ll be treating ourselves with a burger after a particularly productive week at the gym (or a box of wings, a few slices of pizza and some ice cream). If only we could enjoy losing weight as much as we enjoy packing on the pounds.
1. Constantly reminding ourselves the gym is not worth it
Contrary to what fitness fanatics believe, sometimes the gym is not worth it. No matter how badly we may want to fit into our skinny jeans, have a six-pack or rock shorts, when it’s still dark outside it’s just not worth getting up. Besides, aren’t there studies that suggest sleep helps you to lose weight? What if that extra hour of sleep is equivalent to a run on the treadmill. Knowing us and the fact that we’ll be crawling on the treadmill, we probably would lose more weight just sleeping in, right? At least that’s what we tell ourselves, as the alarm goes off every morning, urging us to get up and get moving after we have snoozed it for the tenth time. Oh well, better luck tomorrow. “Yes, tomorrow we’ll go to the gym, for sure,” says every slacker ever.