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15 Of The Funniest Things Tumblr Had To Say About Marvel

In: Pop Culture
15 Of The Funniest Things Tumblr Had To Say About Marvel

When it comes to fandoms, we’ve all witnessed the awe-inspiring wit and wisdom of Tumblr. There are no greater fanboys and fangirls than those who share GIFs of their favorite TV and film moments, obsess over characters and challenge each other to create headcanons that just make too much sense not to accept. Marvel fans, in particular, have a unique sense of humor when it comes to their fandom.

Die-hard Marvel fans on Tumblr, especially one who’s fully invested in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, constantly post Steve and Bucky fanfics, the best collection of Deadpool jokes ever and hilarious analyses. Either these Tumblr users are comedic geniuses or insomnia has warped their brains with the kind of sleep-deprived delirium that often inspire the best “aha” moments. We’ve scoured many blogs to find 15 of the funniest things Tumblr had to say about Marvel. Enjoy!

15. When they pointed out the many derps of Tobey McGuire

Via: Dorkly

OK, so admittedly, Sam Raimi’s first attempt at Spider-Man wasn’t too shabby. It had Spider-man’s origin story, introduced Mary Jane and showed an epic battle between Spidey and Green Goblin. The sequel was nothing to write home about, but we do not speak of Spider-Man 3. Aside from the first three Spider-Man films’ obvious directorial and plot flaws, there was always something at the very core of these movies that just didn’t seem right.

Wait, of course! What did all the Spider-Man films have in common? Tobey Maguire. A poor choice for Peter Parker/Spider-Man, if ever there was a Marvel casting mistake. He was too old for the role, played it much too seriously compared to the comics and didn’t have the right blend of youthful energy and naïve optimism to really sell the character. Tumblr sums it all up in one photo: the many faces of Tobey Maguire as Spider-Man. Derp face after derp face, it’s no wonder they rebooted the films with a new actor.

14. When they cleverly summed up Iron Man 2 in one picture

Via: Tumblr

Remember that time in Iron Man 2 when Tony meets up with Natasha and Nick Fury at a donut shop? Fury tries to get Tony to join S.H.I.E.L.D. and really lays into him for causing chaos due to his laissez-faire behavior. Well, Tumblr nailed that scene in one marvellous post, just by using each actor’s body language to tell a story.

These Tumblr users hit the nail on the head with their description of this scene. Best of all, the second comment hilariously points out the actual similarity of this imaginary scenario to the plot of Iron Man 2. It’s a story not so far from reality. Fury and Black Widow look like the parents and Tony is their misbehaving child. He let Rhodey steal one of his Iron Man suits and now he’s in trouble (and he knows it). “Contrary to your belief you are not the center of my universe,” Fury tells him, like a neglectful daddy who refuses to take responsibility. Meanwhile, Natasha just looks on disapprovingly, totally disappointed in Tony’s actions.

13. When they science-d TF out of Thor’s hammer

Via: Tumblr

Sometimes, Tumblr really outdoes itself. It is baffling to think of the amount of sheer brainpower and imagination it must have taken to come up with this logical explanation for Thor hanging Mjolnir on a common coat hook. They literally science-d TF out of it. It goes from discussing why Thor would leave his hammer at the door to how the heck a hook could possibly hold the weight of Mjolnir in the first place.

“The hook is worthy,” they hilariously suggest, since only those deemed worthy can lift the hammer and have the power of Thor. Then, one user tries to explain how Mjolnir’s weight is actually an illusion and it doesn’t weigh anything at all. In a mind-blowing description, they posit that Thor’s hammer is actually a fixed point in space and that everything else moves around it. Things get progressively nerdier until the logic just blasts a hole into every other possible explanation for how Mjolnir could hang on a measly coat rack. Marvel nerds, man.

12. When they realized beauty is in the eye of Steve Rogers

Via: Strange Beaver

For some reason, there seems to be a disproportionately high amount of Captain America love on Tumblr, compared with Marvel’s other superheroes. Take, for example, this little back and forth about doing your hair and makeup. On the one hand, you have expectations of looking fabulous AF, like Agent Sharon Carter. Your hair’s impeccable and your makeup’s on point. Next thing you know, you’ve followed that YouTube tutorial to a T, but still turn out looking like Bucky Barnes AKA The Winter Soldier.

Luckily, the people of Tumblr have some kind words for your beauty snafu. In either scenario, you’ve won because Steve Rogers, AKA Captain America, loves you. How could you not get the warm and fuzzies after that dose of inspirational Marvel wisdom? ‘Cause, ya know, Steve asked Sharon to marry him and Bucky’s his best friend. It’s a win-win for everyone, despite the possibility of looking like a scraggly raccoon (no offense, Bucky…or Rocket, for that matter).

11. When they realized how in Marvel, life imitates art

Via: Pinterest

Marvel fans are a proud bunch, especially when it comes to the superiority of Marvel films over DC. A crime-fighting billionaire playboy who somehow keeps his identity secret from the world, even though he’s in the public eye? Sure, that could happen, with a little suspension of disbelief. But, a former jailbird with a mechanical engineering degree who ends up at Baskin-Robbins, only to evolve out of his mediocrity to become Ant-Man? Now that’s realism.

There are loads of people who got a degree in one thing and ended up doing something completely different. And, in some cases, there are those who never aspired to greatness, despite their degrees or just couldn’t get a job in their field. Hey, it happens. Tumblr is definitely right about one thing, though; that was totally the most realistic scene in a Marvel film.

10. When they made Daredevil seem like an underachiever

Via: Tumblr

OK, so we’re cheating a bit here. This batch of Marvel cynicism was originally a tweet, but it was posted on Tumblr at some point. Still, you can’t ignore the comments backing up Matt Murdock’s decision to protect Hell’s Kitchen. They defend him with so much civility and humor, you can’t help but wonder why the rest of social media are such A-holes.

It is pretty hilarious, when you think about it, though. Daredevil could surely fight crime in conjunction with Spider-Man and the other defenders all across New York City. There are some pretty awful people to contend with in Hell’s Kitchen, though. Kingpin alone strikes fear into the heart of the mobs and gangs in Hell’s Kitchen (never mind poor Foggy). Instead, he chooses to focus on the neighborhood he’s from and doesn’t branch out at all. If that doesn’t describe 90% of the people you went to school with, then you must really live on the fringes of society.

9. When they were honest about their in-universe crushes

Via: Smosh

Some of the most ingenious Marvel Tumblr posts are just text, like this bulleted list. Contained within that text, however, is one of the most honest fandom confessions ever to be seen. What teenager or 20-something wouldn’t fawn over Bucky Barnes as The Winter Soldier? He’s like Marvel’s answer to an aged and decidedly more masculine version of Gerard Way (although Way now makes comics for DC!).

Poor, emo Bucky. He tragically lost both his parents in his early teens. He lost his best friend, was presumed dead and was turned into an assassin by the Russians. He fell in love with Natasha Romanoff, but couldn’t be with her. What a sad, tragic life he led. He just wanted to be a hero and finally have his mind back. He’s like a little, lost puppy, but with the strength to rip you in half in one move. Some people are into that, though.

8. When they realized Thor’s entourage had mad swag

Via: Pinterest

It’s safe to say that pretty much everyone who saw the first Thor movie wanted an entourage of Asgardians like he had. When they were all together, they looked like the most ferocious crew in existence (#squadgoals, for sure). With their amazing costumes and long, flowing hair, they could have been straight out of America’s Next Top Model, Asgard Edition.

These Tumblr users brilliantly pointed out how truly epic Loki, Sif, Volstagg, Hogun, Fandral and Thor looked together. They even compared the way they were walking to a scene from Mean Girls. Remember when Cady was accepted into the group and they were walking down the hallway, while various students and teachers gossiped and spoke in admiration of them? Loki would totally be the Cady of the group—so distracted by being included that he runs right into a trashcan and falls in, face first. The only difference is, Loki could have just teleported out of there nonchalantly or deceived everyone into thinking it was Thor instead…that trickster.

7. When they analyzed Steve Roger’s look of ecstasy

Via: Pinterest

Don’t you just love how these Marvel fans took a single movie still of Steve Rogers undergoing his Captain America transformation and analyzed the feelings behind the face he’s making? Because when you nerd out so hardcore on a fandom, every single thing has meaning, even the choices made by the character’s actor. It’s a wonder they didn’t speculate why the filmmakers chose to keep that particular take of him in the first place. Maybe they wanted people to have these lengthy Tumblr discussions or they just wanted to sexualize Captain America for all the people who like muscly, shirtless men.

The best part is how they go from thinking it’s a look of orgasm-induced ecstasy (or the “diddly doo orgasm,” as it’s described in Ned Flanders speak) to concluding that Steve must have been high on oxygen. These are very different things, people. It was either an orgasm, endorphins or an oxygen high. It couldn’t have been all of those things, could it? COULD IT?!

6. When this person’s dad pwned Chris Pratt’s name

Via: Tumblr

This story sounds like something that should have appeared on Sh*t My Dad Says. Imagine William Shatner trying to say “crisp rat” with a straight face. Hilarious. It’s so ridiculous, it almost doesn’t seem real. Like, are all dads that clever? Do they just sit around making jokes to themselves about pop culture references? While it’s entirely possible that this whole thing was just made up for the fun of it, it’s highly unlikely, considering it’s so original.

What makes this story so funny isn’t just how it’s recounted, but the fact that it’s so easy to imagine the conversation happening. The dad is just sitting there having a casual chat about Guardians of the Galaxy with his teenager when he just slips in a joke about Chris Pratt’s name. You can almost hear him whisper, “crisp rat.” It almost sounds appetizing, the way it rolls off the tongue.

5. When they gave new meaning to Avengers Assemble

Via: Tumblr

Leave it to Tumblr to not only come up with a hilarious “what if” scenario, but even illustrate it, too. Imagining any Marvel superhero navigating the labyrinth-like aisles of IKEA is enough to make even the most serious fan burst into giggles. Why they were going to IKEA in the first place is a mystery, though. Unless, of course, Clint needed some modern Swedish furniture for his farm. After all, if we look at how he’s portrayed in this illustration, he’s the one who already has the majority of the bookcase put together.

Sure, Thor would be able to pronounce the different furniture names, but he would definitely not be using Mjolnir like a regular hammer. Wouldn’t that smash the screws through the shelves into the core of the Earth or something? That thing has way too much power for the job it’s being used for. They have to draw the line somewhere with this depiction.

4. When they showed their love for Thor’s good heart

Via: Pinterest

Isn’t this the best? Darcy’s so amused by Thor and his enormous appetite that she snaps a photo of him for Facebook. The comments on this post are just so spot-on. Thor is totally clueless, at this point in the story. He has just arrived on Earth and was run over by Jane and tasered by Darcy. But, guess what? He knows he’s sexy, so yeah, he’ll smile. Can’t argue with that logic.

It’s true, though; Thor doesn’t get enough love. On Tumblr, it’s all Captain America this, Bucky Barnes that. Then, there are the Hiddlestoners and Chris Pratt fans. Somehow, they always manage to leave out beautifully buff Chris Hemsworth as Thor. Even The Avengers left him out of Captain America: Civil War, for god’s sake! He was just chilling out in Australia, with his roommate Darryl. Meanwhile, everyone else is finding out where each other’s loyalties really lie and kicking each other’s a**es.

The cutest part of this Tumblr post is how the last commenter just sums up Thor perfectly. He’s such a nice guy, especially after a battle. He just wants to eat, drink and be merry. Everyone can totally get behind that logic.

3. When they came to the same conclusion about Marvel movies

Via: Tumblr

Without a doubt, it has to be difficult for Marvel Studios to condense years of comic book material into single stand-alone films. There’s just so much information about the characters and some storylines have stretched on for years. That being said, did they have to make the plots of so many of the movies the same? The X-Men movies, in particular, are the worst when it comes to interesting storylines.

Once again, Tumblr has cleverly pointed out the flaws in Marvel’s storytelling. Honestly, it isn’t entirely the filmmaker’s fault, though. Comic books love bringing people back from the dead. They’re serials and in order to keep people reading, there always had to be some sort of cliffhanger. Still, couldn’t they have shaken things up a bit and not brought in all the convoluted parallel storylines and alternate Earths? It’s hard enough to keep track of who’s who, especially when they keep recasting the X-Men.

2. When they logic-bombed the Netflix Marvel heroes

Via: Tumblr

Sometimes, the people of Tumblr are just too smart for their own good. Take this post about the heroes of Netflix’s Marvel shows: Daredevil, Jessica Jones and Luke Cage. There’s Matt Murdock, who actually wears a costume to hide his identity, since he’s a public defender (emphasis on ‘public’). Daredevil strikes fear into the hearts of criminals in the same way Batman does; he looks like a scary, nightmarish creature. Then, we have Jessica Jones, who’s a private investigator (emphasis on ‘private’) with a dislike for people. She’s got powerful, super-human strength and endurance, but keeps those powers to herself, so as not to attract attention.

Lastly, we have the virtually indestructible Luke Cage, who already attracts attention to himself since he’s a big dude (and quite handsome, to boot). For some logic-defying reason, this is the superhero who decides he’s not going to hide his identity at all. Even for something that came from a comic book, it’s pretty ridiculous that he’s not shy about hiding his powers. Guess if the other two had super healing powers, they wouldn’t be so reluctant to show off, either.

1. When they got that Loki is actually Tom Hiddleston not the other way around

Via: Pinterest

Does anyone remember that time at Comic-Con when Tom Hiddleston showed up as Loki for the Thor 2: The Dark World panel? He lives and breathes as Loki. There’s no doubt that he loves every minute he gets to play him and probably could do without his regular life as Tom Hiddleston. In fact, as this Tumblr post suggests, Loki basically is playing Tom, not the other way around.

Marvel would never have to twist his arm to get him to come back. He’s a scene stealer in the Thor films and all the ladies love him. Who wouldn’t want to abandon their normal life and be someone else for a while? Isn’t that why actors do what they do? Only problem is, Loki’s going to have a hard time finding work after the masses tire of comic book movies. We’ll just have to look to Tumblr for ideas on what he could do next with his time.

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