The internet is arguably one of the greatest inventions in the history of humanity. Without it, we wouldn’t be able to get things done as quickly as we do today and with the ease that we do those things.
Today, you can talk to people from anywhere. You can shop online, you can take care of your bank account, you can like funny cat pictures on Facebook and you can let the world know what you think on Twitter. That last point is one that many people make great use of. For example, some people share news that are important to their peers. They raise questions and demand answers for pressing issues of society. But sometimes, the people sharing their thoughts on Twitter are not exactly the brightest of folks. Some may just be misinformed, but a few individuals just cross the line of the acceptable. So here we have 15 tweets that will make you want to delete your Twitter.
15. Positive results
Positive is good, right? We all want positive change, we all want a positive number on our bank accounts, we want positive outcomes on every single interaction we have online and in person. But what we don’t want is a positive result on an HIV test. No, in this case, positive is the worst case scenario for you. We don’t know what ended up happening to our friend “Radio Hoe,” but we sure hope that somebody explained to her that diagnostic so she could seek treatment.
Needless to say, this probably wasn’t the first time something like this got tweeted, and it probably won’t be the last time either. But still, as a rule of thumb, you might not want to disclose results of any medical condition you might have or the test results unless you understand those results.
14. Redundancy nation
We wonder what she would want her first son to be. What do you guys think? Hopefully a human boy, but we have no way of knowing what kind of stuff “freak/geek” up there, is into. Still, these are the kind of things that just make your head want to explode and make you wonder if it is really worth it to have a Twitter when you might be forced to bear through reading stuff like this.
The real question here is that out of those 186 retweets and 60 favorites, how many of them were sarcastic, and how many of them were legitimate? Because if most of them are sarcastic, we can still live with it. But in case nobody noticed the mistake up there and those were genuine likes, maybe it’s about time we find a different place to hang out other than Twitter and leave it to these people.
13. The Will Smith lookalike
You know who he also looks like? That dude from Hancock, the guy from Men in Black, that scientist from I Am Legend, the man from The Pursuit of Happyness, and he also looks like Deadshot from Suicide Squad… Should we keep going?
Geeze “awsky,” if it looks like a duck and it quacks like a duck, and it is the dad of the kid from The Karate Kid remake, it’s not a duck, it’s Will Smith.
The worst of it is not that he thought Will Smith wasn’t the guy from Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, but the fact that he only “kinda” looks like the guy from Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. That’s pretty much like saying that Tom Cruise kinda looks like the guy from Mission Impossible, or Vin Diesel kinda looks like the guy from The Fast and The Furious.
12. Barraco Barner
In an age where Google, Wikipedia, government websites, Twitter, Facebook and television all exist, it is not acceptable to not know the name of your president. Also, don’t claim that you know how scary it is that he’s getting involved with Russia, because, honestly, do you have any idea where Russia is?
Seriously though, how hard would it be to open a new tab on your browser and type: “President of the United States”? And if you’re really lazy, you could even just open a new tab and type: “POTUS” and you would get the result. Today when you do it, a picture of President Donald Trump’s face pops up, but back when this tweet went out, you would see Barack Obama’s face and his name. So save yourself some face and do the minimum research before writing anything.
11. The queen of grammar
Hypocrisy. One of the greatest benefits of having free will. Because when we say we want everybody to be equals, you know that deep down, you’re lying. At the end of the day, if everyone’s supposed to be equal, why do we have Olympics or spelling bee contests? If you’re like the girl up there, nothing gives you more pleasure than knowing your grammar is better than that of the girl who just looked at you sideways on the street. Sure, her hair is all nice, but we bet she can’t spell Prometheus.
Needless to say, this person on the tweet above was looking for some validation. She wanted to get those likes to show that she is better than the girl next door and that every guy in her English class wants to be with her because her grammar is flawless.
Too bad that in the tweet where she intended to show off, she committed the one grammar mistake that will have any English teacher grinding their teeth to its roots. You showed them, sister, you showed them.
10. Never trust people on the internet
Out of all the stupid things you will see on Twitter, this here is the perfect example of how people don’t know how the internet works, or at least how most people browsing the web are like. Not only that, but this is a trend. Believe me. You will see similar but still worse tweets like this on this list.
First of all, not everybody on the internet is your friend. You should know that by now. The internet is a beautiful place, but it is also a place for everybody. At the same time that your mom, your dad, your friends and even your little brother or sister are browsing the web, liking cat videos and being nice to other people, there are identity thieves looking for prey like this poor soul up there. Not everybody on the web is like the good folks from your family. From terrorists to identity thieves, anybody can take advantage of the web. So think twice before posting a code of something that is worth your money. SMH…
9. The real Marco Polo
We’re going to take a wild guess and say that this guy is from the United States. Another trend on the web, especially on Twitter is that some Americans have a really hard time understanding the geography of the rest of the world.
Perhaps it goes back to their school days, or they didn’t pay attention to enough maps, or they just didn’t care about knowing where other places around the world were. Nevertheless, the simplest thing any human being on earth should know is that there are more than seven countries on the planet. If you pick any given region in Europe about the size of California, you will have more than seven countries there.
8. When Autocorrect strikes
There are many questions that will continue to haunt humanity: where did we come from? Where do we go? Who created the universe? Will it ever end? Do any of those questions really compare to the enigma posed to us by Sticky Caramel?
Seriously, who needs Plato, Voltaire, or any of the other philosophers throughout history when we have thinkers like this on twitter? Could sex be good without an organism? We dare any scientist to make an assumption about this one.
But coming back to reality, Sticky Caramel up there seems to be yet another person who has fallen victim to the nightmare of Autocorrect. Not only the Autocorrect error, but it’s also impressive that someone could make that many grammar mistakes in a phrase with only eight words (it should be seven words by the way).
7. The sovereign Kingdom of California
And here we are back with geography. Don’t teachers make people memorize the name of the 50 states in middle school or something? Because if you don’t care about any other country in the world, people will complain, but nobody will force you to know where Hungary is on a map. But you should at least know the states of your own country.
Either way, this person made a valiant effort to get away from the US government, maybe he was just too early for anybody else to realize he was right. Maybe he’s from the future, and at some point, California separated from the rest of the US. Or maybe, he just failed miserably at geography and life and put it all on a tweet for the whole world to know.
6. Rosetta Stone versus Rosa Parks
We don’t know where to begin with this one. It could go in either one of two categories. The first one would be simply: use Google. You are clearly smart enough to spell Rosetta Stone, but you’re not smart enough to know what the hell Rosetta Stone is. If your goal was to learn a cool new language while sitting on that bus defending equal rights, sure, Rosetta Stone might fit the category, but otherwise, it really doesn’t fit in your situation.
The other category is: know your history. You can’t just whip out the iconic moment in the history of Rosa Parks fighting for equal rights and then turn the moment around and say other people don’t deserve equal rights. That doesn’t make any sense. We shouldn’t delete our twitters. You should delete your Twitter.
5. The doctor
As many of you might’ve realized by now, spending a few weeks on the internet is enough to give anybody an MD these days. Clearly, if we’ve seen enough ER episodes, we could walk into a hospital and perform surgery. The same way that if you’ve watched enough Supernatural episodes, you could probably make a living through credit card fraud and hunting vampires. But as much as it would be cool to be Sam or Dean, we would probably get killed if we tried to go hunting or something, but we’re veering off topic again so let’s go back to the MD.
Our genius friend John Joven up there is one of the few people who have the internet, a liver and a set of lungs, who might get to a hospital soon enough, complaining that they have lung cancer even though they have stopped drinking. Seriously, some things you see on the internet are just hard to believe.
4. Kurt Cobain’s comeback
Name three questions that will get you your ass kicked in a rock concert. “Kurt Cobain is that guy from Glee, right?” We think we can stop right there because that might be the number one on the list.
The crowds of people who watch Glee and the people who idolize Nirvana and Kurt Cobain are clearly the same crowds, Right? Geez, we’re just sad we can’t see the replies to Amanda Bieber’s tweet. Hopefully, she was lucky enough only to have her Glee crew see that tweet because if that reached a Nirvana-loving audience, she might have gotten a few death threats, as well as a good deal of trolling from some dude living in his mom’s basement in Northern California.
3. When Autocorrect gets nasty
Ouch. Either you two are a really weird couple, or you have just become a victim of Autocorrect. Out of the many life-enhancing gadgets technology has given us, Autocorrect might just be the most bittersweet one. In one moment, it might just save your life before sending a horribly misspelled text. But other times, actually most times, something like this happens.
Now, unless Banesha and her boyfriend are one of the weirdest couples on earth, what she probably meant to say is that her sweater smells like her boyfriend’s cologne. Because if it did smell like his colon, the odds are that the smell wouldn’t be that nice and the little heart emoji with five threes wouldn’t be there at the end.
2. Bae’s first strike
We told you we would have one worse than the guy with the Nintendo gift card. Now, this is naïveté on a whole new level, something way over 9000. Vegeta’s head would explode if he saw this.
This is why we need to teach internet 101 in schools. Obviously, Bae’s debit card is pretty cool. She’s got the cool blue color, the visa logo, the card number, the expiration date, almost everything an identity thief needs to run her bank account dry. There was just one little bit of information missing for any person in the world with access to her Twitter to be able to use her money. And guess what all they had to do was: they just had to ask.
1. The return of Bae
Guess who’s back for more? No, we are not playing. Houston, we have a problem. This is not a drill. Bae struck again.
Following what we assume was a not-so-enlightening call with her bank after they told her somebody had been using her first card; Bae didn’t lose any time and got herself a new one. And obviously, posting a picture of her first card on Twitter was not what prompted people to use it. So what was the next reasonable step for Bae? You guessed it. She lost no time and posted a picture of her new card on Twitter. Now we will have to keep wondering if some kind folks asked her for the number on the back of this new card. And if Bae repeated her legendary antics, willingly telling them the number. Because clearly, people on the internet are nice enough so you can share that kind of stuff with them. SMH…