Not everyone likes the name they’re born with. It’s not just that they dislike the name. Maybe they don’t mind it. Often, it’s the difficulties that come with bearing a certain name that makes people wish they had another one. Some people even go as far as using fake names to make life easier. Then again, if someone’s name comprises of 8 letters or more and especially a couple of those pesky silent letters, it’s easy to see why they adopt a different name. Other times, people use fake names when meeting dates, to stalk exes or crushes, and even to ward of stalkers. There are lots of crazy, yet ingenious reasons why people use fake names. Here are the top 15 and they’re guaranteed to make people go ‘’Whoa!’’
15. So That Nobody Knows What I’m Buying
This person obviously doesn’t want anybody to know what they’re buying. So when they shop for personal stuff online, they use a fake name. That way, nobody gets to find out who is buying what. This person also admitted to stalking the mailman to ensure the parcel doesn’t end up in anybody else’s hands. Although this sounds crazy and kind of ridiculous, you have to admit, it also sounds somewhat ingenious, right? You don’t want anybody to know what you’re buying so you prevent that from happening by adopting a fake name. Smart work! What I’m desperate to find out – as I’m sure you are too – is what exactly this person is buying that requires them to order it under a false name. Shady business!
14. When Meeting Someone Online
While using a fake name can, at times, prove ingenious, it can also prove ridiculous if your little secret gets out. Take this person, for example, who used a fake name with a person they met online. When they eventually built a strong and long-lasting friendship, the truth came out that it wasn’t the person’s real name and their BFF was really upset over it. And now there are all these horrible feelings as a result of the lies. Sometimes it may seem like a good idea to lie, but lying is never good and always (ALWAYS!) leads to trouble. You know what they say; the truth always comes out in the end. So you see, sometimes using a fake name just isn’t appropriate and can actually get you into trouble later down the line.
13. To the Guy at the Bar
Maybe she didn’t like the guy. Maybe he was a pest and she thought it would be a better idea to give a fake name instead of her real one. Who knows? Nonetheless, it did not end too well for her. Lying and pretending to be someone else led to a cringeworthy moment a week after the incident. She bumped into the guy and pretended she didn’t know him. The problem was, he remembered her. In a panic, she told (or more accurately, lied – again) the guy that it must have been her twin sister. Of course, I doubt she even has a twin sister but it just goes to show, using a fake name can end up leaving you red-faced and in a total state of panic.
12. To Stalk a Crush
You have a crush but in a way, you don’t really want them to know you like them. Not yet anyway. You’re too afraid you are going to get rejected and you’re not ready for that. Instead, you create an Instagram account using a fake name so you can stalk your crush and message them, without them ever figuring out who it is. It is smart when you think about it. But it’s also kind of creepy too. Stalking is never normal…it’s always creepy, regardless of your reason for doing it. This person is obviously too afraid to admit their feelings in real life, using their real name, so it’s just easier to adopt a fake name and express their feelings using their non-real name. Ingenious? Of course! Devious? Absolutely!
11. To Stop Guys Stalking Me on Facebook
We’re living in the 21st century. You meet someone, tell them your name and within a few minutes or seconds, even, they’ve found you on Facebook. Maybe they’ve sent you a friend request too or maybe they’re just stalking you to analyze your profile and see what you’re all about. While privacy settings on Facebook do exist, it’s hard to keep your profile totally confidential. And most people don’t use any privacy settings so when they tell someone their name, it’s obvious that person’s going to know all about them within a matter of minutes. Hence, it kind of makes sense that this girl uses a fake name when she meets guys. She does not want them stalking her on Facebook. It’s a smart idea!
10. When Ordering Food
Ordering food should be as easy as buttering bread. Not for everyone! Especially when you have a name that people find difficult to pronounce. This person has one of those names. That is why they use a fake name every time they order food. It is just way simpler and saves a lot of hassle. You can totally sympathize with this person, can’t you? I mean, it must be frustrating having to use a fake name every time you order food and probably for lots of other things too. I am guessing that this person would love to be able to use their real name but to save themselves a lot of name repeating over the phone, it’s just easier for them to use a fake name instead.
9. Because I Want an English Name
A lot of people dislike their name but most of us wouldn’t even consider changing it or using a fake name. It’s easier just to put up with the name you have. You learn to live with it. Some people, on the other hand, simply can’t learn to live with their name. This person, for instance, wasn’t happy with their Asian name so they use a fake English name when they meet people. Some people think this person is crazy and laugh at them for using a fake name. They don’t understand this person simply wants to be treated fairly. Maybe with the Asian name, they simply feel like they are not being treated fairly. While some of these confessions are ridiculous and stupid, some of them (like this one) make sense. Everyone would get why this person uses a fake name. Still, it’s sad that they feel they have to.
8. When I’m Drunk
Everybody does stupid things when they’re drunk. Usually it’s telling someone you barely know ‘’I love you!’’ This person’s thing is giving everyone a fake name. Even the people they know well, who obviously know their real name. Of course there are worse things one can do when they’re drunk. Still, it must be embarrassing when you’re sober and you have to face all the people on campus; the people you gave a fake name to. When these kinds of situations arise, you wish more than anything that people remained oblivious to them. But almost always, they never do. They always bring it up. They always bring up what you did when you were drunk and it’s really annoying. It’s not like this person killed anyone.
7. Because of a Creepy Stalker
This is the kind of case that requires a fake name. If you found out you had a stalker, why wouldn’t you use a fake name? Using your real name seems kind of stupid. Okay, I’m not saying you should use a fake name with everyone in your life but definitely, without a doubt, for the stalker. And maybe for anyone who knows or has close connections to the stalker. However, it’s not really the stalker issue on which this person focuses her attention. It’s more on how the friends this person grew up with speak to her more now that she has a fake name and they don’t even know that it’s them. It’s strange how people work sometimes. But it’s still kind of ridiculous that this person has to use a fake name.
6. Because of a Speech Impediment
This one is totally understandable actually. So don’t judge, people! Having a speech impediment can’t be easy and it must be a total nightmare when you can’t even pronounce your own name correctly. Imagine the frustration! No wonder this person uses a fake name when ordering things. It must be a whole lot easier doing it that way than struggling to pronounce your real name. What’s worse is that this person is shy so it must be uncomfortable for them. My heart goes out and I completely sympathize though it is ridiculous that this girl feels obliged to use a fake name. How sad it is that she is unable to use her real name and that she has to use a fake one instead.
5. To Make Rude Customers Look Stupid
Everybody hates rude customers and usually the rude customers have no reason to be rude. It’s like they are rude for the sake of being rude. It’s ridiculous. With some people you get the impression they enjoy it. So it’s understandable why this person uses a fake name when dealing with rude clients. It’s really smart. At least if the rude customers call to complain, they don’t have any case because the employee gave them a fake name. Ingenious! But it’s still unbelievable that employees have to use a fake name to save aggravation. Still, they get to make the rude customer look stupid and that has got to be a lot of fun. Rude customers are just the worst and they deserve to be punished.
4. In the Case of a One Night Stand
This person sounds like the kind of person who enjoys having one night stands but isn’t too proud of it. That’s why they use a fake name when they go out to a club or to a party. At least if a one night stand does happen, nobody knows their real name and that is comforting. It sounds wise but in many ways, it’s ridiculous. If you are going to have a one night stand, deal with the consequences, don’t shy away and adopt a fake name to avoid the shame. The problem is, most of the time, using a fake name never ends well. It usually always ends in disaster. You end up getting found out, people get upset and blah, blah blah! Just be yourself people.
3. The Thrill of a Secret Identity
The main reason this person uses a fake name is because their real name is hard to spell and that causes a lot of bother when ordering food. It’s just easier to use another name. A fake one. At least if they use a fake name, they can choose a name that’s easy to spell, like ‘’Amy’’ for a girl or ‘’Tim’’ for a boy. It is almost like a life hack for people with difficult names. Anyway, that’s the reason why this person uses a fake name but there’s another reason why: they like the feeling of having a secret identity. It must be kind of cool to act like someone else for a day but if you’re having to do it all the time, like this person, it has got to be draining as hell.
2. To Act Like Myself on the Internet
It’s funny how some people’s personalities change depending on whether they are online or offline. It is as if some people have split personalities: one personality for the internet and one personality when they’re off the internet. This person uses a fake name when they use the internet but, in spite of their name being fake, they believe they act like themselves more than when they use their real name. Bizarre or what??? This person calls it irony. I call it craziness. I actually cannot believe how many people live in a world of make believe, where they refrain from using their real name and even change personalities with a fake one. It feels as though everybody is pretending and it’s pretty scary, don’t you think?
1. When Calling Customer Service
This person is seriously crafty. So listen up customer service: always be polite to your customers because you never know who your customers are and how crafty they are. Take this person. They don’t worry whether or not customer service is polite because they know their address, salary and lots of other personal things, whereas customer service knows nothing about the customer. Especially this customer because they’re name is fake. The only thing customer service knows about this customer is their fake name. You really never know who you are dealing with at the other end of a phone. If you are dealing with someone like this person, well, then you are seriously unfortunate. There have been lots of ridiculous reasons why people use fake names but this one falls under the category of being ‘’really ridiculous.’’
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