We expect teens to go ahead and alarm us with their choices and eyebrow-raising behaviors. After all, their brains are still developing, so we can't expect them to always make the best decisions. Teen blunders come along with the territory, which is why we're always faced with their questionable selfies and social media posts.
Teens are silly little creatures doing silly little things, but they will soon be grown and their choices will improve, right? Certainly, they can't be like this forever! While most kids will grow up to be productive members of society, some will sadly remain in repeat blunder-mode well beyond when they should move on. Teen flops are pretty bad, but adult flops will always take the cake. These grown-up blunders illustrate just about everything that is wrong and scary in this world.
12 A baby or fruit?
Why are grown women forever trying to shove tiny infants into fruits and vegetables? It's like a weird adult disease that only females who have undergone the birthing process seem to suffer from. Let's call it Anne Geddes Syndrome from now on and also let's band together to end this syndrome once and for all. Imagine being a baby who only wants warmth and comfort out of life, yet your mother lives to stick you in watermelons and hollowed out pumpkins. It's a little bit cruel when you stop and think about it. Babies are never going to be cool with you putting their nude bums in cold vegetation, and they are gonna let you know about it...loudly. Please know that if you attempt this, it will be an automatic fail, as well as a fairly poor parenting choice.
11 Well, this is... nice?
Well, this is a choice look there, lady. We expect this sort of artistic travesty from teens, but grown women should simply know better. You've already had your time to try out horrifying looks (they were called the '80s), but by the time you reach adulthood, your outlandish fashion days need to be over. Grow up and wear muted palates and a little bit of mascara like the rest of us old ladies. Imagine waltzing into your kid's conferences or Saturday soccer game looking this! Did no one tell you that you need mom-friends? They are critical to your parenting survival and you won't be making a single one looking like that. It's like she took every YouTube makeup tutorial ever created and poorly applied them to her face all at the same time.
10 They mix-up things on the calendar
Picture Day, Pajama Day, close enough right? After all, they both start with "P." Today's kids have something going on at school almost every single day, so it's actually impossible to keep it all straight anyhow. Being a parent pretty much means that you are destined to miss at least three school spirit days and one field trip per year.
If the point of a school photo is to create a memory, then this mom is straight winning!
Mission accomplished there, lady. Will her son probably hate her at some point for her calendar fail? Despising your parents for their faults is one of the cornerstones of childhood; there is no getting around it. This boy should just be thankful that his parent's fail was only a school picture and not something more permanent like a botched haircut.
9 They can create permanence
Once you turn 18 years old, you officially earn the right to apply permanent mistakes to your body. Hooray for adulthood and hooray for bad tats! Just because you suddenly become a legal adult doesn't mean that you should run out and ink yourself up, especially if spelling wasn't exactly your jam back in grade school. We are guessing that the entire reason youngsters aren't allowed to get a tattoo until they turn 18 is so that they don't come home with this gem across their arm. While it's comforting to think that these fails only affect the young and neurologically underdeveloped, sadly adults are capable of the exact same face-palming feats as teens when tattoos are concerned. This tattoo hurts and brains and hurts our eyes.
8 Mom's Christmas card dreams are over
This is a serious mom fail right here. All this poor woman wants out of life is for her family to create a cute message of holiday cheer for the world to see. Trusting your children to do what they are told is pretty much always going to end up being a massive fail. If you have given them instructions and told them how much it means to you that they do exactly what they are told, just count on a miss.
Trying to snag the perfect Christmas card image with young children is about as easy as hooking yourself a mermaid or managing to catch a nap.
It's not going to happen. Our best advice is to remove the rogue kid from the image and Photoshop him and the second "r" in later. Technology sure is a glorious thing.
7 That's going to leave a mark
Adults have an obsession with perfect family portraits that is the equivalent to teens nearly passing on in an attempt to capture the ultimate selfie. There is literally nothing they won't do in trying to create a magic moment to make their Facebook profile the most majestic one in all of the land. They want those other PTA moms drooling over their photography success. Sometimes their plans are executed perfectly and we all have to stare at their victory each and every time we get on social media. Other times, this type of disaster strikes and we are immediately reminded that even the best laid out family photo sessions can go completely awry when children and over-achieving adults are involved. That's what you get for trying to be Mom of the Year. Bring it down a notch like the rest of us.
6 You're looking at the wrong thing
Eventually, modern technology truly will bring down the human race. Congrats, mama! Here is the beautiful, bouncing baby that you carried in your body for nine long months before you spent 20 hours dealing with the sheer pain of childbirth. Don't you want to meet her? No? OK. We see that you are very busy updating your social media status and letting your Facebook friends know that you just gave birth. Try and pencil looking at your child somewhere in between changing your Instagram profile picture and putting out a few Snapchat pics of you looking like a deer. We find ourselves questioning the priorities of today's youth all of the time, but it's the adults that truly have us concerned. Seriously, where is your head at, woman?
5 Off to daycare...hopefully
Nobody executes a true adult fail like the residents of the local trailer park. These Kings of the Fail have face-palm worthy blunders down to a freaking science. We are equal parts memorized and horrified at their ability to take such a simple task, like driving a baby from point A to point B, and totally muck it up.
Is your car up on cinder blocks in the front yard? No problem!
Trailer park dads can solve this predicament with ease. All you have to do is put the baby's car seat on the back of your motorcycle and off you go! Apparently, helmets and automobile exteriors are for chumps. In the trailer park culture, shirts are also for chumps. All this guy needs is a Colt 45 in hand and the stereotype will be complete.
4 Wait there, we'll get help
Whoa. No dude! This is not great parenting. This isn't even great existing. Get off of that cliff. First of all, what are you even doing up there? That looks really dangerous and pretty foolish. Scaling cliffs without any protection is normally going to end really badly, resulting in some sort of serious head injury. Second, turn around! The kids are following you! Kids will follow you until the ends of the earth when you ask them to stay put. But somehow when you beg them to walk 10 feet through a parking lot holding your hand, they go AWOL. Next time you feel like channeling your inner mountain goat, make sure the children aren't on your heels. Their mother is going to be so cheesed when she sees your massive dad fail.
3 Great, now you'll starve
Adulting is no joke. Suddenly, you are faced with the enormous task of keeping yourself alive without your parent's intervention. Part of this undertaking includes feeding yourself every single day. Thankfully, you can depend on spaghetti. It's basically the #1 transitional food for people figuring out cooking as they enter adulthood.
It's easy to make, cheap as can be and looks a little bit fancy when you put it on a real plate and use a real fork.
Spaghetti done right is a genuine food of the gods. Spaghetti fails, though? Just quit now. Don't even clean it up, it's going to take forever and it's so depressing to have wasted all of that effort in trying to do some serious adulting. Pack a duffel bag and move back in with your parents. Call your mother; she will deal with this fiasco for you.
There is truly nothing like getting your head stuck in the city bus doors while you jet off to your shiny, new grown-up job. How our gal here misjudged this one is beyond us. Toddlers can figure out how to get in and out of these spaces without having their heads chopped off, so why can't you? Preoccupied adults rushing to and from work always leave us with a good ol' fail to chuckle at. Do us one favor, girl—don't go into work and tell anyone about this. People will question their decision to give you employment if you tell them you were late to the office because you got your head jammed in the city bus doors. Good luck surviving your 20s. If this is how it is going thus far, the fun-filled parenting years might undoubtedly break you.
1 No more drinks for you
Adult men who have had a few drinks, put teen choices to shame. Everyone has that one friend in the bunch that drinks one too many at the neighborhood barbecue and pulls this stunt. Whatever you guys do, do NOT call Jerry's wife. This might make the neighborhood women pee their pants laughing, but that is only because this is not the father of their children stuck in a piece of playground equipment.
Jerry's wife is not going to be forgiving him anytime soon for this idiotic and embarrassing move.
We hope the family couch is a comfy one, Jerry, because when your wife catches wind of your playground fail, you will be a permanent resident on that thing. No more for Jerry; not if his wife isn't there to supervise.