www.thethings.com

15 Embarrassing Confessions From Those Who Fail At The Gym

We've spent countless hours at the gym over the past several months, in hopes of acquiring a beach body we'll actually be proud to show off in our bathing suits this summer. We assumed we'd grow to love or at least tolerate running, biking and lifting weights eventually, but... nope. We hated every single minute of it. There's just nothing enjoyable about being all sweaty and smelly, surrounded by other sweaty and smelly people. Then we have to add our awkwardness and clumsiness to the mix and remember those sketchy meathead dudes who love to hit on women who are simply trying to workout in peace... it's no wonder the gym has become our personal hell. These confessions from our fellow fitness haters prove we're not alone in our extreme gym discomfort, and serve as a hilarious reminder that it could definitely be worse!

Continue scrolling to keep reading

Click the button below to start this article in quick view

Start Now

15 Buckle up!

Via: whisper.sh

Your evening workout is pretty much the worst part of your whole day. School and work were stressful enough, so you really want to just relax in front of your television until it's time for bed... but you don't want to look like a complete blob by the pool this summer, so to the gym you go! This gym (un)enthusiast was under a lot of stress and couldn't find the motivation to exercise without smoking some weed to calm him down, but he went a bit overboard. The dude got so incredibly high, he thought he needed to buckle a seatbelt to use the gym's stationary bicycle! We're sure he looked like a complete moron to everyone around him, but luckily, he was probably too stoned to really care.

14 Too weak to even function

Via: whisper.sh

There's nothing more humiliating than using a machine right after your gym's resident bodybuilder-in-training. You watch as the cocky, constantly-grunting fitness buff lifts several hundred pounds, then when it's your turn to have a crack at the bench press machine, you have to embarrassingly take nearly all of the weights off and still find yourself struggling. This poor gym-goer wanted to try his hand at the bench press machine for the very first time, shamefully stripped the bar of all of its plates, but still couldn't lift the bar and found himself crushed under its weight. He can't get stronger without lifting weights, but if he's too weak to lift weights... what can he possibly do?! We don't blame him for giving up, because this is just tragic.

13 Taking advantage of those gym TVs

Via: whisper.sh

There's always a new movie or show on Netflix that you can watch instead of going to the gym. Unfortunately, not everyone has Netflix. Or cable. In this confession, someone revealed that she pretty much only goes to the gym so she can watch television while on the treadmill, since she has no way to watch any of her favorite shows at home. Hey, we definitely can't blame her for that! We can't imagine life without TV, so we'd totally do the same... even if it means we'd have to get all gross and sweaty to stay in touch with what's going on in The Bachelor or Riverdale. Besides, the gym doesn't say you have to run fast to use the treadmill—you can totally walk at a glacially-slow pace so you can focus on your shows.

12 When you push a bit too hard

Via: whisper.sh

Working out means constant twisting and pushing, so unexpected farts can get squeezed out a little more often than you might like at the gym. Sometimes these farts are silent and you can just look around the gym, pretending to be searching for whoever's behind the foul scent you just released. Other times, unfortunately, they're extremely loud and you have to pray that everyone around you had headphones in or was too focused on their workout to notice. This confession is too real, and we've all been there. A flatulent girl let one rip in front of her friends while they were warming up, and she had no choice but to play it off like nothing happened. Hopefully her friends did the same to save her some humiliation.

11 Healthy lifestyles are overrated anyway

Via: whisper.sh

It wasn't easy forcing yourself to actually get off the couch and head to the gym, but after some serious soul-searching, you finally did it. You threw on some workout clothes, reluctantly drove to Planet Fitness, and went straight to the cardio machines to warm up. Then you saw a commercial for your favorite fast food joint on the big TVs, and said, "screw this, I'm out." That's exactly what happened to this hilarious confessor—she only worked out for a few short minutes before a Taco Bell commercial forced her to give up on her fitness aspirations and healthy eating plan and go buy some tacos instead. Having a toned body sounds awesome, but having a Doritos Locos Tacos Supreme sounds a lot better!

10 Fake laughter hiding real tears

Via: whisper.sh

Most of the guys at the gym are complete creeps. Nearly all of them are drenched in sweat and smell like they prioritize fitness over personal hygiene, and when they're not staring at girls in the gym like animals stalking their prey, they're staring at themselves in the mirror and low-key trying to pose and flex to assert their dominance. All that doesn't really stop them from being nice to look at, though. This girl found herself checking out one of the jacked dudes in her gym while running on the treadmill, and her lack of focus caused her to trip and fall. The guy she was checking out didn't notice... but the three hot dudes running right behind her did! So embarrassing. She laughs whenever she remembers the horrible experience, but we have a feeling it's just fake laughter hiding some very real and deserved tears.

9 Wait, what?!

Via: whisper.sh

It feels amazing every time you accomplish a new PR at the gym. You worked on a particular exercise for weeks, and a feeling of euphoria and pride flows through you when your hard work pays off and you set that new personal record for yourself. It shouldn't, however, feel so amazing that you ejaculate. This gym lover got a bit too excited when he did some "heavy ass" reps on the bench press, and actually ejaculated during the workout. While we're not sure how this is physically possible, we're absolutely horrified that this is something that can actually happen in real life and agree that it sounds "embarrassing AF." Hopefully he brought an extra pair of gym shorts to change into. He should buy that bench press machine dinner or something, too.

8 Say goodbye to that workout buddy

Via: whisper.sh

If you're really hoping to get in the best possible shape, you need to find a workout buddy with similar goals to go to the gym with you. Your exercise partner can hold you accountable and make sure you're actually working out as often as you're supposed to, and they can push you to run faster, train harder and lift more than you would have been motivated to on your own. This girl proved that sometimes the issue isn't finding a good gym buddy... it's keeping one. Especially if you're a bit clumsy. She was working out alongside her friend, but a brief slip caused her to drop a weight on her friend's foot. Her blunder broke three of her buddy's toes, keeping her out of the gym for several weeks and likely losing her a workout partner forever.

7 Perception is reality

Via: whisper.sh

Be honest, you've always been a little bit jealous of those people who live a super healthy lifestyle and find genuine enjoyment from exercising. They all have amazing bodies, minimal health issues and they somehow seem happy despite the fact that they don't get to enjoy pizza or Netflix binges. You're not jealous enough to actually give up your favorite unhealthy foods and lazy habits, though. This girl came up with the perfect way to give off the impression that she cares about her health and wellness, without actually dieting or going to the gym—she just wears gym clothes everywhere, to create the illusion that she's a fitness buff! They say that perception is reality, so this may be a genius way to trick people into thinking you're fit, without having to put in any effort.

6 This is why we only wear sweats at the gym

Via: whisper.sh

Anyone who feels like their body looks like a sack of potatoes knows how difficult it can be to muster up the courage to head to the gym and workout alongside a bunch of already-toned fitness aficionados. This tragic woman's yoga class was absolutely filled with in-shape people, but instead of running away in horror like we would have, she held her head high and walked into the room. Her confidence, sadly, wasn't enough to keep her from completely embarrassing herself. She bent down and ripped her yoga pants! That would be enough to make us too ashamed to ever set foot in a gym again, but it got even worse: She wasn't wearing underwear. Hopefully this horror story will help people learn from her mistake.

5 One man's motivation is another man's nightmare

Via: whisper.sh

We all try to find our own unique ways to stay motivated at the gym. Some people resort to using pre-workout, so the jolt of adrenaline and caffeine will push them harder. Some people make playlists or download TV shows onto their phones, so they can have a little enjoyment while lifting weights. And apparently, some people move their treadmill behind someone using a stationary bike, so they can pretend to run after the biker like a madman in a horror movie. We'd say that this is a super clever way to have some fun exercising and would try it ourselves, but the bicyclist he was "chasing after" got extremely (and understandably) uncomfortable by the stunt and the guy got kicked out of his gym. So maybe it's not the best idea.

4 Gonna be awkward at the office tomorrow

Via: whisper.sh

Some girls carefully plan out their gym outfits and even go so far as to put on makeup and do their hair so they look absolutely flawless when they exercise. Others understand that they're probably not going to meet their soulmate while lifting weights or running on the treadmill, so they just throw on something comfortable and focus more on their workout than their appearance. This unlucky girl didn't realize that her comfortable pants were sheer, and that everyone in the gym was able to see her underwear through them. That included her boss, who tragically chose that particular day to reveal that he signed up for the same gym as her. We guarantee things are going to be pretty awkward in their office from now on!

3 This is actually pretty genius

Via: whisper.sh

Are you tired of going to the gym and having every guy there stare at your butt when you try to do some squats? Are you sick of guys interrupting your runs on the treadmill to ask you for your number? Of course you are. Well, this genius woman figured out a way to keep sketchy dudes away for good—just throw on an engagement ring and make sure to flash it whenever a dude starts to look your way. It doesn't matter if you're not actually engaged or if the ring is a cheap dollar store knock-off... guys will see that thing and immediately move on to the next, seemingly single girl. If you don't feel like wearing a ring during your workout, just keep it in your pocket in case of emergencies!

2 The ultimate Catch-22

Via: whisper.sh

This is a problem virtually every reluctant gym attendee is all too familiar with. You want to be muscular, but you're too intimidated by all the muscular people at the gym to work out there. Unfortunately, you can't ever be like the muscular people at the gym if you don't, you know... go to the gym! This poor guy confessed that he's tired of being skinny and has always dreamed of bulking up, but he just can't stand the thought of working out next to guys twice his size and feeling like a lame weakling as a result. It's okay, dude—not all of the muscular guys you're so envious and fearful of were gifted with perfect genetics, so they were the skinny guy at the gym once, too!

1 We all know this struggle

Via: whisper.sh

Some people claim that working out is easy, but finding excuses not to workout is just so much easier! You've got work to do, tests to study for, food to cook, shows to catch up on... how could you possibly make time for the gym?! This confessor sounds like all of us, every time one of our loved ones ask us to workout with them. He told his friend he couldn't go to the gym with him because he already had plans to go with his brother, but then canceled on his brother as well because he simply had to watch Netflix! Bailing on your workout buddies isn't cool if you initially agreed to help each other reach your respective fitness goals, but sometimes, friendships and promises just have to come second to your love for television.

More in Nope