Ice-T: rapper turned actor, cop-killer turned cop (wow, what a resumé). Without him, NBC's Law and Order: SVU just wouldn't be complete. Fin Tutuola (Ice-T's character) is not only a badass detective who will do whatever it takes to arrest a perp and close a case; he also knows how to clap back like no other detective in the squad. This guy isn't playing around.
Fin's delivery is sharp, dry, and perfectly timed. But it's his attitude that's what really his scenes so memorable. Fin does not hesitate to put a suspect in his place, and his own co-workers are frequently the targets of his sass. But of course, they don't mind - it all comes from a place of love...right? Besides, an insult from Ice-T might as well be a compliment. Let's take a look at Ice-T's best one-liners in the SVU series that prove he is one of the best parts about the the 18-season crime drama.
15 "...I Just Know Stuff"
In episode 20 of season 5, the Special Victims Unit investigates the case of a murdered assistant district attorney. During the course of the investigation, they figure out that the ADA was actually gay and having an affair with his coworker (yikes). The detectives suspect that the co-worker, Andy Abbott, may be the murderer, but there's one problem—he has an alibi.
Fin presents the theory that Andy's alibi (his friends and fellow poker players) may be lying for him because they all have something to hide. He suspects they're on "the down-low," men having sexual relations with other men. Fin knows so much about the down-low that his fellow detectives give him a strange look. That's when he says, "Don't look at me, I just know stuff." Surreee you do, Fin.
14 "Well This Must Fave Fell Off The Back Of Some Truck"
In episode 11 of season 4, the detectives find themselves with a new case after a six-year- old is taken to the hospital for a nearly fatal gun shot wound, and the doctors discover that she has gonorrhea. The child was killed during, what appeared to be, a botched stick-up at a video store, but the detectives soon discover that the shooting may have been a hit to prevent the girl from telling her parents she was being abused.
Munch and Fin go to visit the apartment of the suspected hitman who was also shot during the crime. After finding a fancy stereo system in his room, Fin says, "Well this must have fell off the back of some truck." The sass is just too much, there are so many things he's dying to blurt out.
13 "I'm Gonna Kill You!"
When Detectives Stabler and Fin go to arrest a murder suspect in this episode, they find him vomiting because he's had too much too drink (classic). Fin, who has no patience for cleaning up someone's mess, reads the suspect his Miranda warnings and tells him not to puke in his car in the same sentence - which, is totally Detective Fin.
The suspect does manage to make it to the police station, so we can assume that he managed not to throw up in the car. Because if he had, he'd be dead for sure. Fin is not the type of guy to not follow through with threats. You can understand why he was so serious about this. If you've ever had anyone throw up in your car, you know it's a nightmare.
12 "That Sounds Equal To You?"
This one is more of a two-liner, but it's too good not to include. Fin was all over the unequal treatment of black and white crime victims by the police, a year before the first season of The Wire even came out.
In episode 4 of season 3, the Special Victims Unit hunts for a serial killer who is raping and murdering young black women. Fin confronts Captain Cragen, demanding to know why this case has been given virtually no manpower, in comparison to cases of white women who have gone missing in the same borough. Cragen tries to say he knows where Fin is coming from, but Fin tells him to check his privilege, proving that he's always been the wokest detective on SVU.
11 "You Want A Deal?"
This is the very last line in the episode from season 5. When the detectives finally get a DNA sample from the perp and match it to the DNA samples left on all six murder victims, the murderer finds himself backed into a corner. When presented with the evidence against him, he says, "I want a deal."
Fin is having none of that nonsense. For a deal, he offers to bring the killer his last meal before he's executed. AND....fade to black. This may be one of the best SVU endings of all time. You may not agree with the death penalty, but you can't help but share in Fin's satisfaction as he tells killer he has nowhere to run. Sometimes, the good guys win.
10 "You Like To Try Makin' Em?"
In episode 16 of season 2, the detectives go on a search of a missing girl whose father is also an NYPD detective. Munch and Fin visit the last address of a known criminal named Lance Kanick, who they think has information regarding the girl's whereabouts. At the building, they find a sleeping doorman and proceed to interrogate him.
The doorman insists that Kanick only uses one of the building's extra mail boxes, and the only thing he knows about him is he drives an SUV. When Munch asks, "What's the license plate number," the doorman says, "Oh yeah, that's one of my hobbies, remembering license plates." To which Fin responds, "You like to try makin' em?" The doorman quickly lost his attitude and gives the detectives the mail that Kanick has not picked up. Boom- Fin wins again!
9 "Then I'd Be Your Boy, John!"
This exchange, which takes place in the same episode as the one from number seven, perfectly captures the relationship between Munch and Fin. Munch and Fin go undercover as businessmen to question an attorney about where Kanick is. Fin, at first, does all the talking. When the lawyer points at Munch and asks, "Who's he?" Fin answers, "That's my Jew. Where's Kanick?"The best part of the scene is that Fin can be hilarious while never breaking character.
They get the information they need, and once the duo is safely outside, Munch asks, "What if I called you 'my boy'?" Fin, in great spirits for having successfully obtained Kanick's phone number, responds jovially, "Then I'd be your boy, John!" You have to love the brotherhood between these two.
8 "You Are Now All MY Bitches"
In episode 4 of season 12, Fin lays down the law when looking for a teenaged boy who has fallen victim to human trafficking. With the help of an officer from the NYPD's Vice unit, Fin rounds up a dozen pimps to interrogate. Right off the bat, Fin makes it clear who's the boss. Which is, ahem, him, of course. Fin asserts himself as the alpha dog and gives the criminals a taste of their own medicine.
Eventually, one piece of scum steps forward and says one of his girls knows the teenager Fin is looking for. The pimp tries to smooth talk Fin, but Fin is having none of it. Fin gets the pimp to arrange a rendezvous, resulting in the successful apprehension of the missing boy and this EPIC one liner; "Fact! You are now all my bitches!" Ugh, Fin, what a way with words.
7 "In Case You Haven't Heard..."
In episode 14 of season 5, the detectives investigate a murder that looks like a ritual human sacrifice, but they discover that the crime is actually linked to the modern day slave trade. (There are about 60,000 people currently enslaved in the United States.)
The detectives discover that the murder victim's sister is currently enslaved by a wealthy white woman living on Park Avenue. Stabler and Fin arrest her at a banquet, and when she demands to know why she's being arrested, Fin says, "In case you haven't heard, Lincoln freed the slaves." Later, in the interrogation room, the woman tries to deny that she purchased the girl, but Fin is having none of it. He gets her to admit where she purchased the young girl, so the detectives can go rescue the other kids still being held prisoner. #FinForTheWin
6 "Easy For You To Say..."
In episode 12 of season 2, the detectives investigate the murder of a school teacher, and discover that she was a sex addict who frequently visited shady websites and clubs. After Munch and Fin discover the victim's dark secret, Munch shares a story about how his ex- girlfriend once hung a wall-sized nude photograph of him as her center piece at an art gallery exhibition, without asking him first.
Fin is less than sympathetic. Later in the episode, the detectives get into an argument after Fin calls a suspect, "Not a killer, just a perv." Munch fires back, saying that the participants in the sex clubs aren't pervs, they're all consenting adults who are not hurting anyone. But Fin fires the last shot, "That's easy for you to say, Mr. Letting It All Hung Out At Some Art Gallery."
5 "The Stink Of Pimple Cream Turns My Stomach"
In episode 16 of season 3, the detectives investigate the case of an eighth grade girl named Cynthia who they think was raped by one of her teachers. Because Cynthia hasn't been forthcoming about the incident, Munch and Fin go to talk to her boyfriend, Tommy, to figure out what might have happened.
Fin is not excited about doing the interview. As they approach the school, Fin says to his partner, "I hate talking to kids this age," to which Munch replies, "That's because you can't smack 'em if they give you lip." Fin, never afraid to smack anyone, responds, "Who says I can't?" Munch then asks, "So, what is your issue with the pubescent sect?" And Fin answers, "The stink of pimple cream turns my stomach."
4 "Do Twinkies Last Forever?"
Episode 7 of season 7 begins with some construction workers discovering human teeth and a jaw bone in their supply of sand. The SVU detectives arrive at the scene just as one of the forensic investigators digging through the remaining sand discovers an old lunch box that appears to be from the 1970s.
Fin opens the lunch box, looks at the contents, and says, "Okay, I always wanted to know this..." When Munch asks, "What?" Fin says, "Do Twinkies last forever? Give you 20 bucks, take a bite." The contents of the lunch box is never shown, but we can assume the Twinkie inside was probably in perfect condition. There's a high school teacher in Maine who still has a Twinkie that's been sitting unwrapped for about 40 years. (GAG!)
3 "Those Kids Don't Look Like Freaks To Me"
In episode 14 of season 9, the detectives race against the clock to figure out who stole a cryotank full of frozen embryos from a fertility clinic, before the tank defrosts. While searching for anyone who may have had a vendetta against the clinic, Detective Munch finds a group of "donor siblings" who are trying to find the sperm donor who fathered all of them, donor number 1029.
Detective Stabler says the kids must be angry that the clinic won't give them the identity of their biological father, to which Munch replies, "For all they know, I could be donor 1029." Without missing a beat, Fin claps back with, "Those kids don't look like freaks to me." You need some ice for that burn, Detective Munch?
2 "Doesn't Sound Like MasterCard"
In episode 23 of season 5, the detectives are called in to work the case of an elderly woman who was murdered in her home. They soon have another victim on their hands, and the only connection they can draw between the two women is a doctor, Matt Spevak. They discover that Spevak was committing fraud in order to pay for his gambling addiction, prompting a search of his apartment.
Munch and Fin are in charge of doing the search. Munch sees that the answering machine is blinking and Fin says, "Probably a collection agency." Munch plays the message, which says: "Hey Spevak, you're late again. You better pay up, Doc, or we're coming over."
With impeccable timing, as always, Fin says, "Doesn't sound like MasterCard."
1 "I'm The Total Package"
At the end of episode 12 of season 11, Fin goes undercover as a hit man to apprehend a career criminal named Anne Gillet. Wearing a ski mask, Fin pretends to shoot Detective Benson and another detective joining in on the case, Ash Ramsey, and help Anne escape from their custody. Little does Anne know, the scene is a dramatic staging.
When they arrive at a hotel, and Fin takes off his mask, Anne says that she never expected the hit man she hired to be so attractive. Fin responds with, "I'm the total package." Even though he was playing a part at the time, Fin probably still genuinely agreed with the compliment. He's a badass undercover cop, and he looks great while doing it.