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15 HIGHLY Inappropriate Texts That Never Needed To Be Sent

Just because you can send that text doesn’t mean you should. There really is such a thing as going way too far. We come up with these hilarious and bizarre jokes that we think our friends or dates will appreciate, only to find out that we probably traumatized them in the worst possible ways by sending these text messages. And text messages can be forever, if your friends decide to save them, or be burned upon the brains of those unfortunate enough to receive these texts. You won’t be unable to un-see many of these. In fact, these highly inappropriate texts might make you laugh so hard that you’ll fall out of your chair or be so shocking that you won't be able to forget them. Make sure you’re sitting down and have access to pillows and soft things to fall on.

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15 Dad, we didn't need to know that

Via: worldwideinterweb.com

Look, we know that our parents get it on. That’s how we were born into existence. But we don’t need reminders about it or to know any of the gory details. This dad really didn’t need to send this particular text back to his kid about why they won’t be getting a new car. Dad could have chosen a different example to make his point. Egads, this makes us want to wash our mind’s eye with bleach. It’s a mental image that we certainly did not want. We don’t need to know dad’s troubles with mom in bed. That’s totally their business and should stay that way. Dad should have NEVER sent this inappropriate text message. We have no words for this, and it’s no wonder that the kid didn’t send a response after that.

14 No one really needs to think about the Hulk's D this much

Via: thechive.com

Not only did they send their inappropriate text to the wrong person, the text message itself is so far out there that we just can’t even. We don’t want to think about the size of The Hulk’s D. Sure, he’s a giant of a man, but let’s get real here. The thought kind of grosses us out. Like, it grosses us out quite a bit. The person who was meant to receive this text dodged a bullet in their friend getting the number wrong, because it is a frighteningly inappropriate thought to share. It should not have been sent. There’s a good chance that the person who sent it was drunk or high, though. This kind of question is the type that might only be broached when you’re not right in the head.

13 What the cat

Via: imgur.com

Cats are the sweetest and most devious animals we know, and we love them so much. The kitty has become associated with lady parts over the years, though. Because of this, people will often make the joke that they’re surrounded by p*ssy or that they’re playing with their p*ssy when they’re actually just hanging out with their cats. This girl even went so far as to make a photo that hinted at possible masturbation in her nether regions and sent the text. By the end of the text message, she had revealed that she had her little kitten sitting right beside her hips. Her boyfriend had other thoughts going on in his head (and other head, too), but nope. She totally played him.

12 The BF who thinks sharing his poop experience is romantic

Via: imgur.com

We know that everybody poops. It’s a natural and a healthy thing to take a dump. But what isn’t appropriate is texting a play-by-play of your pooping to your significant other. That’s a text message that shouldn’t have happened. And this guy seems to think it’s super-romantic to discuss his pooping with her. In fact, he claims that he can’t poop without her there AND goes on to say that it was a “raunchy” poop. Oh. My. Gawd. That is so disgusting. Poop might be necessary and all, but we don’t go out of our way to smell it. At least, he didn’t text her a photo of his turds. Perhaps he has done just that in other text messages, though. Sorry, dude, this is just too gross.

11 When your mom can't even call you by your name anymore

Via: blazepress.com

Moms are great, aren’t they? But this mom seems to have forgotten her daughter’s name and called her the B-word. It’s a little unexpected. Sure, we call our friends that as an affectionate term as we reclaim the word, but it can still be jarring when our mothers call us that. Even if it’s just a joke, it’s still really weird. She was so shocked by her mother’s text message that she had to screenshot it and share it online. Maybe mom shouldn’t text like she’s one of her daughter’s besties anymore. Sometimes parents try too hard to be our friends that they cross the line in text messages and on social media. Of course, we don’t know the context. Maybe this mom actually thinks her daughter is indeed a b*tch and isn’t happy to be picking up her daughter.

10 We don't want to think of buttholes as extra pockets

Via: thechive.com

This particular text message seems like the type of “deep thought” you would have when really high or drunk. If this is how this person normally thinks, we’re very frightened about the thoughts in his head. It’s pretty much a terrible idea to store items inside of your body cavities. But this guy thought he had stumbled across a brilliant idea. What does he want to store in his butthole? It sounds like he means to store normal things that you put in pockets, like wallets and pens and maybe business cards. That would be very unhygienic and dangerous to use your butthole as an extra pocket for all your stuff. His “keep it safe” comment also suggests that he would store valuables in his butthole. That’s a big fat no, dude.

9 The group message from drunk hell

Via: runt-of-the-web.com

Imagine the type of hell you might put your friends through when you’re drunk, and this might be the result. His friends received a group text message that he had peed on a cat. (That poor kitty!) Your evening would be ruined if you received a text like this. Plus, animals aren’t safe around this guy when he’s drunk. Group text messages are the absolute worst to begin with, and he makes it even worse when an inappropriate and gross update is the message that he sends to all of his friends. He really shouldn’t have sent that text. It’s too late now. Some poor unfortunate cat was peed on by a random drunk dude. SMH. The guy who sent this text message needs an intervention—and fast.

8 Wrong vibrations

Via: winkgo.com

Neighbors can be great. They can also be creepy AF with the stuff they think they know about you. Apartment living means that your neighbors can sometimes hear what’s going on in your apartment through the walls and make assumptions based on what they hear. Well, this neighbor assumed that the vibrating noise he heard in his neighbor’s apartment came from a vibrator and decided to hit on her in the creepiest way possible. It turns out that the vibrating noise came from a vibrating toothbrush instead. Now it’s just awkward, and yet he still doesn’t back down. Don’t make assumptions or use them to make creepy comments to your neighbors, folks. His inappropriate text message should have never been sent. Time for her to block his number because he’s a total creeper.

7 Mom should never, ever have sent this

Via: buzzfeed.com

Auto-correct made this one happen. Jacob kept trying to type that he had scared the “crap” out of dad, not that he had scared the “cum” out of him. But mom had to take it one step further and say that getting the cum out of dad was her job. Ew. Ew. Ewww. While it’s technically very true, it’s not something that we want to think about in any detail. This mom should have kept that to herself. Jacob might have trust issues after that comment, or he won’t be able to look at his parents the same way again. It was HIGHLY inappropriate. And now we know that mom and dad are still very active in the bedroom. Good for them and all, but we still don’t want to picture it in our minds.

6 Wrong number, guy still manages to be creepy

Via: pophangover.com

This text message went a completely different direction than we expected. He seems to be texting someone to do a trade. Garbage Pail Kids trading cards must be a big thing in the world of collectors, and he wanted to get an El Camino for them. But he didn’t stop there. He also said he would be willing to give his body in addition to the trading cards.

Once he realized it was a wrong number, he didn’t stop texting like a normal person would. He decided to see if he could get laid anyway and revealed that he was a 63-year-old man looking for nookie. Yeah, no wonder he wasn’t getting any responses. He had the wrong number and just kept getting more inappropriate and creepier with each text he sent. He should have stopped long before he got to the end of that one-sided conversation.

5 Parents announce their plans to get busy tonight

Via: 9gag.com

This one is not a typo. Mom wanted to get laid with Dad tonight, and she wants to make sure the kids don’t come home for now. While most parents would find another way to get the kids out for the night, this mom decided to go for the blunt and very graphic truth to keep the kids away. So inappropriate. Parents should just keep us in the dark about this stuff. Yeah, we know it goes on, but please be as vague about it as possible. None of us want to know every detail about it. And mom and dad should really avoid telling us in the future. It’s definitely a text message that should not have been sent. We really don’t like getting inappropriate texts from our parents.

4 Sent a rude text about his date to the wrong person

Via: dailymail.co.uk

Wow, Jeremy is a total jerk. He isn’t required to want to go on a second date with Sarah at all. Sometimes people don’t have chemistry or whatever. But his reason for not wanting to see her again is all about her timing on when she would get sexual with him. And he accidentally sent his rude text to her instead of to his friend. TBH, the text should have never been sent in the first place. He’s very much a jerk who doesn’t deserve to go out on dates with girls when he has no respect for women in the first place. Sarah just found out sooner rather than later. She knows what a jerk he is before falling for him. Say good bye, Jeremy. It’s over.

3 Mom jokes are terrible jokes

Via: complex.com

This is one dirty joke that mom should NOT have made. She has a new phone and likes the vibration setting. Why? Because it vibrates even better than her sex toy. So, two things: We know that mom has a dildo and that her phone’s vibrate setting can turn her on. This is not something that her child wanted to have knowledge about. Then mom has the audacity to smile about it and say that she needs a smoke… as if she’s just gotten off. Mom actually continued the joke after her child expressed disgust at the very thought. Her kid is going to be so traumatized from this knowledge now. And mom is totally enjoying making her kid uncomfortable. This text message is one that should be filed under Texts That Should Never Be Sent.

2 Maybe her baby really is ugly

Via: dailymail.co.uk

Look, we know that sometimes babies can be really ugly. They might become cute kids and gorgeous adults later in life, but the truth is that babies aren’t always adorable bundles of joy. Even so, this text is inappropriate because it’s so cold and cruel. It was also accidentally sent to Kelli. Whoops. It really pays to double-check who you’re texting before you send an offensive or inappropriate text message. This girl failed to do that. So, now Kelli knows how she feels about her baby. Of course, Kelli thinks her own baby is beautiful. That’s to be expected. But her friends should also not be such jerks behind her back. This could have been avoided. Text messages leave a digital trail of your rude comments, as does what you post on the internet.

1 This is wrong on sooo many levels

Via: ebaumsworld.com

Wait... WUT? That’s our reaction when we first read over this text conversation. Apparently, her first text about “licking [her] cat’s bumhole” was not a typo or an auto-correct. She also sent that inappropriate and appalling text to the wrong person, so now two people have to learn about this habit of hers. Listen, cats know how to clean themselves. And if they’re having trouble, you can use a cat bath wipe or a paper towel and some water to help them out. What you shouldn’t do is lick them yourself, especially in their nether regions. That’s very unsanitary for you and, well, it’s gross. No good can come of this at all. She needs to be stopped, that’s for sure. And she probably shouldn’t text these things to other people either. This text message should have never been sent.

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