How angry are you? I'm gaging your emotion right, aren't I? Everyone is angry right now. Either they're furious with how The Last Jedi turned out or they're irate with the fans who feel that way. Therefore, I think it's safe to say that you fall into one of those two factions to some degree or another. It's too bad since the climate isn't too positive nowadays anyway. Star Wars is something that's supposed to bring people together. Instead, it has torn us apart. If you're one of the few people who hasn't seen the new Star Wars yet, you probably should go out and do so as this article will surely spoil the experience. If you're someone who has seen it, or simply doesn't care, let me poke the grizzly a bit more and dive into 15 Last Jedi memes that totally spoil the movie.
P.S. Angry fanboys, there will be stuff in here that will trigger you. If you can't handle it. Relax. Take a breath. The force is with you, always.
15 Title Escalation
You know what else escalated quickly? The amount of loathing leveled at the new Star Wars movie. I'm not saying I agree or disagree with disliking The Last Jedi. For the record, I'm very conflicted about it. But I guess I probably liked more than I disliked it. Regardless of its flaws, I don't think that The Last Jedi deserves the amount of hate it's getting from the diehard fans. I will say that if I were Ron Burgundy, I too would look at the last three titles and notice how off they seem. How could things have gotten so bad so quickly after seemingly being so great? Well, that was one of the biggest issues I had with The Force Awakens. So little was explained. The filmmakers had an obligation to lead us into their new world a little more than they did. This issue continued in The Last Jedi. Some of the answers were given to us, but not in the way we wanted or needed.
14 Not Your Luke
I'm sorry, I think Rian Johnson's decision to make The Last Jedi's Luke different from the one we've grown up with was the best choice he could have made. Yes, angry fans, I completely agree that some of the writer/director's execution of this idea was very poor. Some of Luke's scenes felt completely underdeveloped and rushed. We could have seen a few more vulnerable scenes where we really understand why Luke has gone through the transition into a curmudgeonly old man. But I like this evolution because it makes sense.
Not only are people seldom who they were after 30 years, but Luke's rebellion failed. Evil rose once again in the form of the First Order. The prophecy of Darth Vader didn't come true. The Dark Side came back. Luke's efforts failed. This story choice was interesting and tied into one of the umbrella ideas of the film; which is that sometimes the old ways don't work. Sometimes the past needs to die for us to fulfill our greater destinies. The character choices made for Luke felt authentic to all of that. And Mark Hamill was the best he's ever been.
The truth is, he's not YOUR Luke. He's Star Wars' Luke. And he isn't perfect. Nothing and nobody is.
13 Divisive Filmmaking
There's truth to the criticism that diehard Star Wars fans are getting annoyed. I know a lot of us are sick and tired of hearing that we complained that The Force Awakens was too much like A New Hope and The Last Jedi is too different from Empire etc. etc. But there's truth in that. We can never be happy. Our expectations are somewhere that's unreachable. And every single one of us has a different idea of what the perfect Star Wars movie is.
I agree, that we want the right balance between the old and the new and some of the decisions that were made in The Last Jedi didn't hit that equilibrium. But most of the ideas do. They just weren't all that well executed on the screenwriter's part. Every Star Wars film is going to be divisive. That's the nature of anything that's near-and-dear to people's hearts. Empire was divisive when it first came out. In fact, every good film that's ever been made has been. Notice how almost everyone and their cat hated The Phantom Menace...
12 'The Simpsons' Predictions
Star Wars: The Last Jedi (2017)— Simpsons Films (@simpsonsfilms) December 17, 2017
(dir. Rian Johnson) pic.twitter.com/mgw7fXm9Fn
The Simpsons predicted the 2016 U.S. elections, watch communication, Farmville, baby translators, and now The Last Jedi. In all fairness, The Simpsons have literally done every idea under the sun. They were bound to hit upon flaming trees, medical bubble bodies, trippy body duplication, and an evil old man being cut in half at some point or another. They have literally done EVERYTHING, after all.
In South Park, there's even an early episode where they try and do something that The Simpsons hasn't already. Needless to say, the task proves very difficult. So, we can go digging through our old Simpsons DVDs to find what the plot of the next Star Wars movie will be. Or we can just sit back and expect that they've figured that one out, too.
11 That Shirtless Scene
Hard to escape Star Wars today 🤣— Lin-Manuel Miranda (@Lin_Manuel) December 18, 2017
Just got this text pic.twitter.com/zWAYkE0S7E
Anakin had a shirtless scene in Revenge of the Sith. Luke had a shirtless scene in Empire Strikes Back. Shirtlessness is something that's not completely uncommon to the Star Wars universe. So, why was this one so off-putting? Perhaps it was because Kylo Ren is the supposed villain of the new trilogy and having him shirtless may have been too much of a vulnerable moment for us to see him in? Maybe it was because it was shot through such a wide lens that made it impossible for us not to see Adam Driver's chiseled chest? Or that it didn't serve the plot like Anakin's shirtless nightmare scene or Luke in a medical tank scene did? Or maybe, just maybe, it was the fact that Rey told him to put a shirt on. The level of meta-self-awareness was just a bit too much. Either way, expect countless Adam Driver shirtless memes to come through your iPhones over the holidays.
10 Ewok Envy
Oh, come on! You have to admit that the Porgs were pretty cute! They're definitely less nightmarish than the Ewoks. I was happy to see that the Porgs were only in the background of the story. They didn't impact the plot in any way. Much like how most background animals in movies don't. They exist in nature as anything else would. Yes, they clearly were present in The Last Jedi for merchandising purposes; that goes with any Disney film. But because they didn't impact the plot in a way like the Ewoks did in Return of the Jedi, they didn't cause a similar uproar. You have to remember, a lot of people were furious about the inclusion of the Ewoks in the Star Wars universe. People thought they were too cute. Too unrealistic. Too silly.
Please, tell me that you're seeing some correlation between the response to that movie and this one?
9 How The Force Works
I agree that this was the strangest scene in the entire movie. It felt out of place. It felt underdeveloped. It felt forced... (no pun intended). But I'm pretty sure original fans of the Star Wars movies were confused when Obi-Wan suddenly turned up as a ghost in Empire Strikes Back. Force ghosts weren't established in the first movie, how could they randomly show up in the next one? The truth is, in almost all of the movies, and in all the non-canon shows and books, the Force is always revealing new elements that we didn't know existed. Whether it's force projections or flying through space, there's always a new surprise in store. We can argue the execution of some of these new powers, but the facts are that the Force isn't defined by you. It's defined by the filmmakers who are constantly pushing it in new directions.
8 Yoda Plays With Fire
Star Wars : The Last Jedi (2017) pic.twitter.com/pUgH1BlyCD— Big Snoke (@wilhuffs) December 18, 2017
If the police are out there trying to track down any of the a**holes who burn down houses and trees around Christmas, tell them to start searching a creepy, little, green man with a walking stick.
Yes, Yoda's cameo in The Last Jedi proved that he's a bit of a pyromaniac. I, for one, was pleasantly surprised with the scene in question. It was the one spoiler that was divulged to me before I actually saw the movie. I must admit, at first I was worried about Yoda's cameo, even though I knew it would be in force-ghost mode. I think the scene added to the overarching idea of the movie and helped inspire Luke to do the right thing again.
Aside from the clear dramatic purpose of the moment, I was thrilled that Yoda was a puppet once more and voiced by Frank Oz. It brought me back to the good old days of Empire and Return of the Jedi... Even though Yoda did become responsible for the burning of everything sacred to The Jedi Order.
7 How To End The Movie?
Did Luke have to die at the end of the movie? Was the explanation (or lack thereof) of his death satisfying? My answer would be yes to the first and no to the second.
From a filmmaking point of view, the theme of the film made it pretty obvious that Luke had to pass away at the end. The Last Jedi is all about the old ways dying out in order for the new ones to be able to find their way. However, there were massive problems with how this idea was executed. Luke mentioned early on that he wanted to die, though failed to give us enough context into why he hasn't just killed himself already.
As for the death itself, while it was cool to see the Force-projection in action, we have no idea what the costs of doing this is. So, we didn't know that it would kill a Master Jedi. It also would have been far more rewarding to see Luke face-off with Kylo in the flesh. Though, having said that, there was something beautiful about him disappearing into the two setting suns. I'm very torn about how this tragic death took place. I think more work needed to be put into it. But ultimately I believe it was the right decision.
6 Those Pokémon Though
Those Porgs are hella cute. And yes, those crystal foxes are hella cool. But you have to admit that they both look like they could easily be included on Ash Ketchum's Pokédex. Granted, it's hard to design anything that doesn't look like it could be a Pokémon nowadays. The creators of Pokémon have little monsters that look like walking trees, after all.
As thrilled as I am that Rian Johnson wanted to include new space-creatures in his movie, he does have to live with the Pokémon comparison. The new creatures included in The Last Jedi that may not have to deal with it are those that Luke was milking on the island. Though, as I write this, I'm sure there will be some Pokémon enthusiast that'll angrily write that those green-milk creatures share a resemblance to some random Pokémon that no-one has ever heard of.
5 Leia's Last Flight
Whether you liked how Disney and Rian Johnson portrayed Leia in The Last Jedi or not, you have to admit that seeing her on screen for the last time brought tears to your eyes. With Disney thoughtfully unwilling to use CGI to include her, as well as the rumored time-jump for Episode 9, it's highly unlikely that we'll ever see Carrie Fisher as Princess/General Leia Organa again. Carrie's passing last year hit me particularly hard as she was a personal hero of mine. She was exceptionally brilliant, funny in a quick and cutting way, and always held herself with grace even at the worst of times. Though she's been in countless brilliant roles (When Harry Met Sally included), it was her one in Star Wars that made her a recognizable talent. It's heartbreaking that The Last Jedi was the final time we'll see her in that role. Hopefully, she would have enjoyed the film.
4 Rian Respect
When Rian Johnson was announced to be the writer and director of the then-untitled Episode 8, I think a lot of fans were thrilled. I know I was. After all, Rian was behind such brilliant films as Looper and his debut feature, Brick. If you haven't seen Brick, I highly recommend you take a look at it. It features a brilliant performance from a young Joseph Gordon-Levitt and is overall one very gritty, authentic piece of cinema.
Rian Johnson is also behind three of the best episodes of Breaking Bad. That is, of course, a lofty compliment as almost all of the episodes of Breaking Bad were beyond stellar. The most beloved episode might just have to be Rian's "Ozymandias"; a piece of exceptional story-telling that I hope you remember when you claim that Rian is a bad director.
3 Bob's Moment Of Meditation
After all of this squabbling, I think we require a moment of calm. This is when we slip on our Snuggie, curl up in front of our TVs, and switch on the irrevocably soothing voice of Bob Ross. Good ole Bob would have been the right person to calm down the angry fans after leaving the cinema. Hell, he's so good that if he were alive I'm sure he'd be able to convince all of us that he should be the one to direct a Star Wars movie. I mean, just look at the care that's gone into those Stormtroopers. Not even George Lucas could pay that amount of attention to detail. By the way, I'm sure I'm not the only person to make this observation, but do you think that Bob loved painting bushes because his hair looked like one? Food for thought... Now, let's get back into the controversy...
2 It Would NOT Have Been Better
No, this wouldn't have been better. Not in a million years would it have been better. If you think that it would... you're lost! You're sick in the head. You should have no contact with the outside world. Jar Jar is the worst character in the Star Wars universe. He was only included in The Phantom Menace for comedic purposes. It had nothing to do with any of your lunatic controversies about him being a Sith Lord. That thought just adds credence to the stereotypical Star Wars nerd being a basement dwelling virgin with no life. Sorry, but it's true.
I was so happy that none of the crazy fan-theories pervading the Internet came to light. It made Star Wars exciting again. We didn't know what to expect while we watched it. The only thing we did know was that Disney wouldn't be stupid enough to give Jar Jar another day in the sun.
1 It's Not A Dream, WAKE UP!
I know this is what some of you Star Wars fans want. But it's not a reality. This happened. And it's a movie. So calm the f**k down! I grew up with Star Wars, too. It's vital to my life. I care deeply about what happens to it. But grow some perspective already! It's not the end of the world that you didn't like this film. I hated Phantom Menace, but it happened. It wasn't a dream. I live with it and don't write nasty internet letters demanding that Disney erase or re-make it.
Yes, The Last Jedi is far from a perfect movie. There are some total mistreatments of characters we love, and a couple middle fingers to the plot-lines setup in The Force Awakens. There are cultural problems. There are pacing problems. There are performance problems that so few people seem to want to talk about. But at the end of the day, it's escapism. It's entertainment. It's a motion picture. And it's a far cry from a bad one...
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