Even though the Lord of the Rings film trilogy made its debut in theaters in the early 2000s, the fandom is still alive and well on Tumblr. There are still die-hard Tolkienites who discuss both the films and the books, muse about the fate of mysterious characters such as the elf Maglor, son of the infamous Feanor and Nerdanel, and squee over gifs of cool scenes such as the Ride of the Rohirrim in Return of the King.
The following 15 posts will make anyone who sets aside time to not only re-read the entire trilogy, but also watch the extended editions of the films, squeal with absolute glee. Tolkien Tumblr fans just *get* what this entire fandom is all about.
15 Frodo Doesn’t Age
I won’t lie, I got a huge kick out of this post and started laughing hysterically the first time I saw it. The artist has a point though—Elijah Wood AKA Frodo Baggins hasn’t aged at all since the filming of The Lord of The Rings trilogy. Maybe Elijah really IS Frodo, and instead of destroying the One Ring in the fires of Mount Doom like he was supposed to, he decided to take the Ring for himself. That would explain why he hasn’t aged, and why the 2016 elections in the U.S. went to hell in a handbasket so quickly—it was all a distraction so that Frodo could consolidate his power, and declare himself the new Dark Lord and Master of the One Ring.
14 Frodo Is Sick Of The Memes
This gifset is a riot because if Middle Earth had the Internet, I imagine Frodo would probably be sick of the memes about his adventures and the constant jokes about the Fellowship’s battle against the Dark Lord Sauron. “Ugh Gandalf, did you see the latest Lord of the Ring meme on Tumblr and Facebook? Why am I so popular? Seriously, why is that? Why can’t they…I don’t know, make more memes about that Harry Potter bloke at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardy instead?” Of course, Gandalf would try to make him feel better, but I think it would only make Frodo attempt to facepalm—after all, Gandalf is older and doesn’t quite get Internet culture, so of COURSE he sees it as no big deal.
13 The Witch King Really Hoped Eowyn Wouldn't Be His Downfall
I laughed so hard at this Tumblr post because you KNOW that was pretty much what the Witch-King was thinking when he faced off against Eowyn and Merry in Return of The King. I’m sure his reaction went from “Wait, what? Okay, it’s a woman and a hobbit. The prophecy referred to a male human, right? I got this, I can TOTALLY defeat her in hand-to-hand combat. Ain’t no thing like me, ‘cept me!” to “Oh s***, this isn’t good, she’s beating me! What if the prophecy was vague, and did refer to Eowyn and Merry? Hey Sauron, send help and get me out of here! I don’t want to be beaten by a girl and a hobbit! Where are the other Nazgul at? They need to help me get out of here ASAP!”
12 The Elves Definitely Had Their Own Drama
I snickered so hard when I saw this post because it is SO true. In the films, the elves of Middle Earth are portrayed as these beautiful and peaceful beings that are a whole heck of a lot smarter than both men and hobbits. Unfortunately, for all of my fellow die-hard Tolkienites out there who have read The Silmarillion, we know that isn’t true. Just look at Feanor—he swore an oath of vengeance against Morgoth and anyone else who tried to take the Silmarils from him. Heck, he killed his fellow elves and his sons seized the ships created by the Teleri just so they could go to Middle Earth and recover the Silmarils from Morgoth. Feanor was a great craftsman, but he definitely wasn’t wise or peaceful.
11 Legolas And Thranduil Are Too Dramatic
I giggled when I saw the similarities between father and son. Both Thranduil and Legolas are just so damn dramatic. Instead of just saying something simple like “Yea, Sauron is returning to power, and here’s the evidence,” they have to use long-winded explanations such as “a malice that doesn’t sleep is stirring.” Because really, that could be anyone or anything. Is Sauron still trying to take back the One Ring, or are they talking about an elf with insomnia or who is sleepwalking every night? With those kind of flowery explanations, it could go either way. I suspect that since both Legolas and Thranduil live for being dramatic, they purposely speak with that kind of flowery prose to make themselves sound a lot cooler than they are.
10 Best. Crossover. Ever.
I LOVE this crossover idea, and I think it’s brilliant to muse on how Harry Potter would have changed if the series existed in the same universe as Lord of the Rings and Albus Dumbledore was the reincarnation of Gandalf the White. It does make sense—there were times during Michael Gambon’s performance in the Harry Potter films where I felt as if he was channeling Ian McKellan as Gandalf. If Dumbledore WAS the reincarnation of Gandalf the White, then it is too bad that he didn’t have another epic battle scene like when he fought off the Balrog. Although I guess fighting off the Inferi when he took Harry to try and retrieve the Horcrux made from Salazar Slytherin’s locket was pretty bada**. I’m shocked he didn’t yell out “You shall not pass!” to the Inferi and told Harry “Fly, you fool!” during that scene.
9 Legolas Hates Giant Spiders
I can’t stop laughing at the thought that the mighty Legolas Greenleaf is afraid of giant spiders. To be fair, he has every right to be—in The Hobbit, it was revealed that there giant spiders living in Mirkwood. If I grew up having to watch out for spiders the size of a house, I would become an arachnophobe too. Heck, I hate normal sized spiders and other creepy crawlies like centipedes. Every time I see one, I bust out the can of Raid or look for an old, trusty shoe. I totally understand the feelings of revulsion for spiders, Legolas. Regular spiders are bad enough, but giant spiders that are VERY hard to kill are the stuff nightmares are made of. Too bad they didn’t have Raid in Middle Earth, the elves of Mirkwood could have just used a can to drive out the spiders.
8 I’d Laugh If Someone Used The One Ring As Their Wedding Ring
I giggled so hard when I read this Tumblr post because it would be utterly hilarious if a couple made the decision to use replicas of the One Ring to be their wedding bands. I’ve heard of my fellow die-hard Lord of the Rings fans having theme weddings, with items such as elven cupcakes with the Fellowship’s leaf brooches or having a wedding cake emblazoned with the image of Gondor’s White Tree, but it would be amazing if a couple used replicas of the One Ring as their wedding rings and started reciting “One Ring to rule them all, one ring to find them” during the ceremony. Or even better, started reciting the lines in the original tongue: “Ash nazg durbatulûk, ash nazg gimbatul, ash nazg thrakatulûk agh burzum-ishi krimpatul.” Then again, that might go over the heads of non-Tolkienites, and I don’t know if they would get the joke.
7 I Wonder If The Balrog Started Sassing Gandalf
I won’t lie, I snickered at the mental image of Gandalf being more irritated and huffy about the Balrog rather than being terrified, like the rest of the Fellowship was during that scene. After all, Balrogs were once Maiar, just like Gandalf and Saruman, so I would not have been shocked if Gandalf knew the Balrog who lived in Moria before he was corrupted by the original Dark Lord Morgoth. Maybe there was a friendly rivalry between Gandalf and the Balrog known as Durin’s Bane back when they were both living with the Valar, and it only got worse once Durin’s Bane got corrupted by Morgoth. That would explain why Durin’s Bane looked pretty ticked off in the films when he finally caught up to Gandalf and the rest of the Fellowship in the mines of Moria.
6 Everyone Cries At The End Of ROTK
Honestly, who doesn’t cry at the end of Return of the King? I will admit that I still feel ALL of the feels when Aragorn tells the Hobbits that “they bow to no one” and then bows to them, which leads ALL of Gondor and its allies to f****** bow to them. It’s such a beautiful and moving scene, and it gets me every time, even though I’ve seen the movies about a million times already so I know what is going to happen. I also love seeing how adorably awkward the Hobbits are in that scene. Frodo is clearly thinking to himself “Oh man, please get up, this is embarrassing me” while Sam is all “Errrr…what is the proper protocol for a situation like this? No one at home is going to believe this when I tell them about the ceremony.” Meanwhile, Merry and Pippin are going “Okay, okay, can they all stand back up already?”
5 Now Everyone’s Going To Want To Be A Hobbit
Honestly, sometimes I wonder if our society would be a better place if we followed the Hobbits’ example and everyone came of age at 33. There might be less issues, especially if we also adopted their laid-back attitude towards life. If the Hobbits visited our world, they’d probably be shocked that 18 was considered to be the age of an adult. I can almost here Merry and Pippin’s jaws dropping when they heard about that. Heck, Pippin would probably be dumbfounded and say something like “Wow, 18? That is WAY too young. I was so immature at that age!” Of course, his BFF Merry would interject with some snarky retort about how Pippin is STILL immature even though he’s technically considered an adult by Hobbit standards.
4 The Avengers Of The Ring
I giggled at that thought of Aragorn trying to be like Tony Stark from The Avengers and calling the Fellowship “Middle Earth’s Mightiest Heroes.” It’s just so funny to imagine because Aragorn was nowhere near as arrogant as Tony Stark/Iron Man. I adore Tony, but let’s face it—he DOES have an ego the size of Texas. Meanwhile, Aragorn is far more humble and laid-back. Heck, the guy even constantly worried that he was going to be cruel and greedy just like his ancestor Isildur, and that he would fall prey to the influence of the ring. Even though Arwen did her best to reassure her boyfriend, he still didn’t believe her. It was only after he let Frodo go that he realized he wasn’t Isildur and wouldn’t make the same mistakes that his ancestor did.
3 Sauron Would Definitely Try To Have Killed The Eagles
It has always annoyed me when I see non-Tolkienites try to say that the trilogy made no sense because all Frodo and Sam had to do was take the eagles to Mordor and toss the ring into Mount Doom in order to destroy Sauron. This Tumblr post explains perfectly why that would have failed. Besides, doesn’t anyone remember that Sauron’s form was basically a giant flaming eye? Don’t they think that he would’ve seen the eagles with the Hobbits on their backs coming from a mile away and ordered a Ringwraith with a wyvern to attack them? It was better to let the Hobbits sneak in undetected so Sauron had no idea what was going on and let them destroy the ring while he was distracted.
2 If Aragorn Was A Hobbit, The Whole Story Would’ve Been Different
I’ve heard that in Tolkien’s first draft of Lord of the Rings, the character of Aragorn was originally written to be a Hobbit with wooden feet named Trotter. Apparently, the reason why Trotter had wooden feet was due to the fact that he was captured by the forces of Mordor and tortured. I just can’t picture the kingly Aragorn as a Hobbit, especially since the image of Viggo Mortensen as everyone’s favorite grimy Dunadan is cemented into pop culture. But the fact that the early draft of the story had Aragorn as a Hobbit named Trotter makes me wonder—would Trotter still have fallen in love with Elrond’s daughter Arwen? That would’ve been one weird romance, let me tell you. At least human Aragorn’s romance with Arwen Evenstar parallels the Beren and Luthien story.
1 Quickbeam Needs More Appreciation
Honestly, who doesn’t love Quickbeam? I remember reading the original trilogy and thinking that Quickbeam was so cool. As much as I love Treebeard and his long-winded speeches to Merry and Pippin, he always seemed too otherworldly and I felt that it was a bit hard to relate to him. On the other hand, Quickbeam was clearly a young Ent and he clearly had no patience for his species’ slow ways, so he felt a bit more relatable to me when I was reading the books. I’m sure Quickbeam skipped the Entmoot because he didn’t want to deal with the older folks giving long-winded debates about whether or not they should go to war against Saruman. Plus, Quickbeam is a bada**--once the Ents decide to go to war with Saruman, he’s the first one leading the charge. What’s not to like about this cool Ent?