15 Mistakes That Put People Face To Face With Danger

15 Mistakes That Put People Face To Face With Danger

Mistakes are as unfortunate as they are unavoidable. The fact is, you’re going to screw up, and some mistakes will bite you in the butt harder than others. One day, you might forget to pick up the paper; regrettable, but ultimately insignificant. The next day, you might encounter an alien life form. You might bring her into your home, all Elliot and E.T.-style, and bond with her, feeding her delicious prepackaged snack cakes and playing video games, only to discover she was a spy for her race, gathering information for their deadly invasion—and when you think about it, that’s a lot worse than leaving the newspaper in the driveway.

So before you screw up anything else, check out these 15 mistakes that put these people face to face with…danger.

15. “Lost dog” found by friendly neighbor on Stupid Mistake Lane

Via: pinterest.com

There’s a saying from back where we grew up. It goes, “Never mess with a goose who’s guarding her golden egg.” We’re not really sure what it means, and we also have no idea how that phrase might apply to what’s going on in the image above, but we figured we’d share it anyway. You’re welcome? We guess?

Useless phrases aside, picking up your non-friendly neighborhood coyote seems like a bad idea to us. Apparently, we just have an unreasonable fear of getting rabies, because this person wasn’t the least bit put off by taking in a feral dog. Well, when the “owner” comes to pick their “pup” up, this person should probably change their sheets before they sleep in their bed again, just to be safe.

14. Drinking in public never goes well TBH

Via: pinterest.com

This is why you should never get drunk out in public. It’s too dangerous. Even if you luck out, and the stupidest decision you wind up making is taking sauced selfies, you can’t count on all of the other drinking people not to engage in a drunken brawl. Regina George’s mom may have been an annoying nincompoop, but maybe she was onto something when she told Lindsey Lohan she would rather her drink in the house.

Bad things happen when alcohol has dulled your senses—at least, they do when you’re out in public. It’s best to stay home if you want to get absolutely stinko. If you do it at a bar or something, you might end up inadvertently coming face to face with danger, like this girl.

13. He’s as tough as nails—literally

Via: buzzfeed.com

We like to imagine this guy standing by a wooden fence in an alleyway, drinking beer with his buddies, like on King of the Hill, talking about all of the cool things they’ve done, trying to out-tough each other. Yeah, well. They may be a ferocious gaggle of guys, but their bravery will never be able to come close to this guy’s. Once you drive yourself to the ER with a nail in your heart, you pretty much take the cake when it comes to tenacity. It’s hard to top that.

You know what this guy is? He’s literally tough as nails. Somebody needs to take that nail right there and figure out how to incorporate it into a trophy to give to this man for being so brawny.

12. The last mistake this kid ever made

Via: tumblr.com

How did this kid have time to Tweet this dangerous selfie when this was clearly the last photograph they ever took? We’re not saying something bad happened to them. At least, we hope that’s not the case. But the fact remains, that teacher back there is wearing a look that she’s killed men with. That same icy gaze, that “son, today, you gon’ learn” face, is not just a hostile expression. It’s a weapon of mass destruction.

While we ready a rescue crew to go in and save this poor kid from danger, you all sit here and keep looking at this picture. We don’t know why, so we guess you had better think up a reason. Do it because…danger…yeah, that’s it. Stare down the danger. You can do this.

11. Stay in your lane, Mr. Twister

Via: bbc.com

“Alright, Saturday! Woohoo! Can’t wait to go to that barbecue at Herald’s tonight. It’s gonna be a blast! But I’ve got some chores I should attend to before that. Let’s see, what’s on today’s to-do list? Water the cactus. Check. Reorganize the book shelf. I think I’ll put that one off until this afternoon. Okay, what’s next? Ah, mow the lawn. I think I can tackle that one right now. It’s not too hot out, this will be the perfect time. In fact, it’s kind of overcast. And what’s that over there? A tornado? Huh. That seems pretty dangerous. But I do have to get these chores done. Hmm. Well, I s’pose that tornado’s got its schedule, and I got mine. So screw it, I’m going to mow the backyard.”

10. Are you an octagonal traffic sign? Because STOP

Via: 9gag.com

There are good ideas, there are bad ideas, and then like a million miles away, entering the realm of seriously crap ideas that make you want to punch the person who thought them up right in the face, you have this awful, awful notion.

We know junkies make smuggling things around in a butt hole look cool (and just in case you can’t tell, we’re saying that with the utmost sarcasm), but you simply have to refrain from doing that, alright? Trust us. Besides, have we ever tried to steer you wrong? Look, we know we once told you it’d be funny if you shoved that peanut up your nose and you wound up in the hospital for two weeks, but still. We’re right on this one.

9. Grandma IS Mr. Robot

Via: dumpaday.com

When Grandma purchased a computer, she quickly came to love the internet. She joined an online crafting community, and she even signed up for one of those “Twitter” things that her grandchildren were always going on about. Things were going great.

But Grandma soon discovered she had an uncanny knack for hacking. She used her talents to break into the local library’s book request system, and put herself at the front of the line, ahead of the other library goers, when a new book came in. Her library heist spiraled out of control. One day, the police knocked on her door. It had nothing to do with the hacking, they were just looking for some kid’s stolen bike, but Grandma took it as a sign to put an end to her hacking antics. So she destroyed her computer, obliterating all evidence of her criminal activities.

8. Guess you could say he’s…”some pig”

Via: strangebeaver.com

This post is about people who made mistakes that put them face to face with danger, but this is just a proud looking pig in a cop car. How the heck does this fit in with the rest of the lineup? Who made the mistake of releasing this terrorizing swine, if releasing this terrorizing swine can even be called a “mistake?” Just what the heck is all of this about, anyway?

This pig may not have made a mistake that put him, or other people, face to face with danger, but the farmer in charge of him who forgot to lock his pig pen did. For that farmer, in committing such a careless, foolish mistake launched the first attack of what would come to be known as the Boar War.

7. He doesn’t have bad hair days, he has a bad hair life

Via: pinterest.com

This man is a danger to himself and others. Look at that hair. If he’s willing to make a ghastly mistake like that to himself, there’s no telling what sort of awful mistakes he would be willing to do to others. A man with a hairstyle like that? He don’t care about nobody. Not even himself. And if this mullet-fro-fringe-gelled back nightmare isn’t enough to convince you of that, then at least be persuaded by the dead look behind his eyes.

We wouldn’t want to run into this guy in a dark alley at night, that’s for sure. Maybe he wasn’t trying to spook the rest of the world with his new ‘do, but he’d better get used to the screams of small children, because that’s exactly what he’s doing.

6. Is this a bad time to point out that his socks don’t match?

Via: starecat.com

This kid had better just be grateful that the vent he fell through wasn’t also a portal to another world, otherwise his lower half would be stuck in an alternate universe right now, and who knows what kind of crap happens there? Actually, an alternate universe sounds pretty cool. Let go, kid. Fall into that Alice in Wonderland-like rabbit hole, and see what sort of adventures ensue. We would totally go for it.

Well, at least it looks like this kid has got plenty of snacks to see him through this dangerous, circulation-cutting-offing mistake. And it’s a good thing that ceiling fan wasn’t running in the bottom picture, otherwise he could’ve been scissored in half. Wow, this picture has a whole lot of pros and cons.

5. Uber: was it really a good idea?

Via: twitter.com

We like the idea of Uber, but in actuality, it’s pretty disappointing. Like, it’s cool to think that you can just call someone who’s trying to earn some extra money to take you some place. That’s a good thing. We’re behind that 100-percent. But when that person actually pulls up to take you where you need to go? Mmmm…yeah, they are always shady. Always.

Hey, don’t worry, we’re not just shooting our mouths off. We’ve got proof to back up our claims. Uber drivers be sketchy AF. Check out this guy’s driver. The dude was straight up carrying drugs—and, ironically, the unlawful drugs were what convinced him to observe the traffic laws—and if that’s not a mistake that puts you face to face with danger, we don’t know what is.

4. He’s a water dog

Via: buzzfeed.com

Aww! He got his girlfriend a dog? That’s so sweet! What a nice gesture. And, oh, is that the puppy right there? Well, it’s…he sure is…that is one nice…huh. We don’t know what to say. We’ve never seen a dog like that before. Is this a new breed, or some kind of mutt? It looks like he’s got some Labrador in him, and possibly some German Shepherd, but what’s with the flipper? Is he part mermaid, too?

Well, whatever. We don’t care if hes a Pomeranian or a Golden Retriever, or even if he’s a dangerous mistake. As long as he’s house trained and likes to go for walks, we think he’ll be fine. But just in case, fingers crossed he won’t maul you when your back’s turned.

3. Of course the playground is safe. Why do you ask?

Via: diply.com

It’s great that this apartment complex has a playground for the kids who live there, but do you think it was a mistake to install said playground to the roof? We don’t want to jump to conclusions. We mean, it’s not like we know where playgrounds should be installed. We fully admit, we don’t know the first thing about kids, so we’re probably not the best person to consult on this issue. It’s just, it seems like that play set is awfully high up there.

Don’t you think maybe this would be better off on, oh, we don’t know…how about the ground? Like a place where kids won’t fall to their demise when they go down the slide? That sounds like a good idea to us.

2. He shouldn’t have lied on his resume

Via: damnlol.com

“‘Oh, can you fix planes?‘ ‘Well, sure! I can fix planes! I’m fully qualified! I don’t need any special training! You can count on me!‘ Ugh! Idiot! What the heck was I thinking?! I was general manager at a Taco Bell, I don’t know how to fix an aircraft! Stupid, stupid. This is what I get for lying on my resume. Well, I’m here, I can’t back out now. I’ll just have to fake it until I make it, that’s a thing, right? Okay, let’s see here. Oh, wow. This plane is about to fall apart! It’s not air tight, it’s got parts breaking off of it. There’s no way it’s fit to fly! But how am I supposed to fix it? Hmm…*snaps fingers* I know! Duct tape.”

1. “You only exist in this internet because I allow you to, d0nn0. Remember that.”—Google

Via: tumblr.com

Alright, alright. We hear you. “Why is this picture in the post? All this guy did was Google his symptoms. How the heck did that put him face to face with danger?” Well if you shut up and listen, we’ll tell you.

Uh, excuse us, but have you ever Googled your symptoms when you felt sick? It may seem like an innocent thing to do, but you’re just asking for trouble. Maybe all you wanted to do was find out why you have a headache, like this guy. But before you know it, Google is handing you a list of reasons why you’re actually a dead man. Google is the new mafia, it’s been confirmed. So watch your back, or you, too, will come face to face with danger.

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