15 Of The Most Savage One-Liners From Sheldon Cooper

For some reason, The Big Bang Theory gets a lot of heat. Some people just don't understand the witty and brainy humor that is central to the show. But it is a show based around scientists and how they try to get by in a world where a majority of people only study science in school. What else do these nay-sayers expect?

The brainiest of the bunch is, hands down, Sheldon Cooper. This Texas native is so incredibly awkward that he literally doesn't understand the meaning of sarcasm. He has no idea when someone is joking versus when they're being serious. He has no idea when his girlfriend Amy is making sexual advances. In a nut shell, Sheldon Cooper pretty much understands the facts of the world, and that's really it. It's because of his large brain and quick wit that makes him a standout favorite in the show and makes him pop out one-liners like it's his job. So here are 15 of our favorites!

15 "Are you still depressed because you're alone and no one loves you?"

A lot of people dislike Sheldon for his brutal honesty. The problem is, Sheldon is so smart, he literally doesn't know when to stop. He doesn't pick up on social cues or hurt feelings. If someone asks for his opinion or vents to them; he's going to give it to them straight.

In the fourth season, Sheldon drops the line, "Are you still depressed because you're alone and no one loves you?", to his roommate, Leonard, after he gets jealous that all of his friends have companions, while he's still alone. This line is so amazing because it's classic Sheldon. He's not even trying to be funny; he's sincerely asking Leonard if he's sad because no one loves him. The funny thing is, no one would actually say this to a pal who is down in the dumps. And if they did, it would be an obvious joke. But when it comes to Sheldon—this was a serious observation.

14 "You Haven't Give Me A Gift, You've Given Me An Obligation"

Leave it to Sheldon to be the only person in the world to hate gifts. We absolutely love being given spontaneous gifts. And we obviously expect them come the holidays and our birthdays. But Sheldon is a different breed. When it comes to receiving and giving gifts, Sheldon sees it as a serious hassle.

In Sheldon's mind, when we're given gifts, we are automatically obligated to return the favor. Not only are we given a gift we didn't ask for, but now we must reciprocate with a card, meal, or gift—that way we're even! It's because of this that he truly hates the holidays. However, his entire theory of gift-giving follows through when he needs someone to do something for him. If he needs Penny to drive him to the mall, he simply gives her a box of chocolates or a small gift. Then, she's in his debt, and he'll simply tell her to drive him somewhere in classic Sheldon form.

13 "Love Is In The Air? Wrong"

Is it just me or can this one-liner be easily said by Dwight Schrute from The Office? Sheldon is clearly smarter than Dwight, but it would be unreal to see these two in a face-off of the brain. And though these two eventually found love themselves, it was touch-and-go for the first couple of seasons. We really thought Sheldon would never find a lady who was up to his standards. As for Dwight, I mean, we just weren't sure if a woman would ever be attracted to the man. But, to our delight, they both found love.

In this meme we clearly see Sheldon unfazed by love, remind us all that love is not actually in the air. What's in the air is "Nitrogen, Oxygen, and Carbon Dioxide." Gee, thanks, Shelly, for killing romance and reminding us about what we learned in six grade science class.

12 "I Promised My Mother That I Wouldn't Start Doing Drugs"

"Coffee is out of the question. When I moved to California I promised my mother that I wouldn't start doing drugs." First of all, we adore that Sheldon is drug-free. But we love that he's drug-free simply because he made a promise to his mother. I believe the show depicts Sheldon in his late 20s - early 30s, so it's sweet that he still cares what his mother thinks of him. Also, can we talk about the fact that Sheldon calls caffeine a drug? I know there are a ton of reviews that consider coffee a drug, so I guess we can't be too surprised,  But nonetheless, leave it to Penny to peer pressure Sheldon into doing something he's uncomfortable with. Don't worry, Sheldon. I don't think a cup of coffee is going to steer you off into the wrong track.

11 "I've Already Had To Say Goodbye To 11 Doctor Whos"

Okay, don't judge me, but I've never seen an episode Doctor Who. However, I am aware of the premise and understand there are multiple doctors the seasons goes through. (Don't worry, I'll catch up eventually.) Not only do I think it's hilarious that Sheldon considers 'losing someone close' to him a fictional character from a British TV show, but I love that they brought up Doctor Who in general. Sheldon could have brought up multiple things, but I love that The Big Bang Theory integrated another actual show into theirs. It's refreshing when we can actually connect with Sheldon for once. The same goes for when Sheldon and his friends bring up Star Wars or Star Trek. All of a sudden, we finally have something in common with THE Sheldon Cooper.

10 "Yes, It's 'Penny Get Your Own Wi-Fi'...No Spaces"

Okay, this entire scene is brilliant! All Big Bang Theory fans know that Penny mooches off of Leonard, Sheldon, and the gang on a daily basis. They buy her dinner, they lend her money for her bills, and they even let her use their wifi. As many arguments as this group gets into, it's clear there is love between them all. But leave it to Sheldon to speak his mind when something is bothering him.

When Penny pops in to ask if Sheldon changed the wifi password, Sheldon replies, "Yes, it's 'Penny get your own Wi-Fi'...no spaces." Boom! Not only does he try to get her to pay for her own Internet, but he does it in the most passive-aggressive way. He knew she would come pounding on the door for the new password, so why not make it something she'll understand?

9 "I Just Really Didn't Want To Come"

If there was a saying we wanted on every t-shirt, it would be this one. When Sheldon shows up to The Cheesecake Factory late one evening, the gang clearly asks him what happened. And his response is nothing short of amazing; "Nothing. I just really didn't want to come." We love how honest Sheldon is, but it's times like these that his honesty is a breath of fresh air. Why can't more people be this real? Instead of making up an excuse for being late, or saying he left later than expected, he simply told them that he didn't want to come. It's as easy as that. The only thing that would have made this scene better is if Sheldon didn't show up at all. Why leave the house when we could hang inside watching Netflix or gaming?

8 "That's Going To Make Me A Chick Magnet"

Sheldon Cooper is a lot of things, but a 'chick magnet' is not one of them. Yes, he has Amy Farrah Fowler on his arm, and has had to fend off a crazy graduate assistant once, but besides those ladies, Sheldon doesn't really strike us as "girl crazy."

During an experiment to see how fast rumors generated, Amy started making up lies about her and Sheldon's relationship to get people talking. She was simply curious how fast Penny told the other members of the gang. When Amy tells Sheldon that she told people his love making was "aloof, but effective," Sheldon was pretty peeved. And not in the same sense that you're thinking. He wasn't upset that she told people a lie about their relationship, he was upset because he figured Amy's description of their love making would cause him to be a chick magnet. And he's already "so busy as it is"! C'mon Amy.

7 "I'd Like To Stop Talking To You"

If I said "If you don't mind, I'd like to stop listening to you" to my fiancé, I'm pretty sure he would be more angry than usual. It's not like Sheldon's thoughts are congested, and he's partaking in selective listening; he's vocally saying he's no longer interested in what his girlfriend had to say. Knowing Amy, however, she is so sweet-natured that she probably asked Sheldon if something was wrong. Ugh, these two really are the dream team. Once again, Sheldon doesn't mean to come off rude—he's just an open communicator and thought it was curtsy to let Amy know he wasn't interested in what she had to say anymore. At least he said "If you don't mind..." right? This way Amy can actually say if she minds or not. As offensive as non Big Bang Theory watchers think this quote is, it's actually hilarious due to Sheldon's personality.

6 "Suffer In Silence"

Most people live with their family, a significant other, or a roommate. Rent is too expensive, and life can be so dull living alone, so why not shack up to save money? But living with other people does come with some consequences. We have to be courteous of their schedule, we have to clean up after ourselves, and we need to respect their personal space. When it comes to Sheldon and Leonard, though, I don't think these rules apply. They're both pretty invasive with one another—and we wouldn't have it any way!

After Leonard had a tough night, he came home to Sheldon chilling at the kitchen counter (probably making tea). When Sheldon asked Leonard if the bad thing Leonard did affected Sheldon in any way, Leonard said "no." At this point, viewers are probably waiting for Sheldon to ask Leonard what happened. What we got instead was Sheldon saying "Then suffer alone." And just like that, us viewers are cracking up alongside Sheldon and feeling sorry for poor Leonard.

5 "Do You Have Any Books About Making Friends?"

Honestly, if it wasn't Sheldon asking this question, it would have been someone else. I, for one, have asked this question repeatedly to my current fiends and family. When we get older and our jobs or families take us away from our home town, making friends is seriously the worst. It's so hard to get out there and introduce yourself to strangers. Why is it so hard!? We're all in the same boat, so why is making a new friend so intimidating? I'll tell you why; we all want to be liked! We're afraid our "new friend" won't like us or will judge the things that we do. It's totally weird. Like us, Sheldon went to a book store and asked if they had any books on how to make friends. The librarian looked puzzled and pointed him towards the kids section. Why is making friends just for kids? We need those kids books for adults, people!

4 "A Woman Is Like An Egg-Salad Sandwich On A Warm Texas Day"

Um, this is something we've never heard of before. I thought Texas men were supposed to be gentleman?

As we all know, Sheldon is from a small town in West Texas. His mother still lives there and brings up his Texas culture and traditions quite frequently. We kind of love that this brainiac has a bit of southern charm to him. However, Sheldon also brings up some dark memories of his father when they all lived in Texas. Besides being an alcoholic, he was also a misogynist and not a good father to our Shelly. And though his past seems dark, we can't help but laugh at some of the lies his father told him. Or should we say "comparisons." According to Sheldon, his father "used to say that a woman is like an egg salad sandwich on a warm Texas day." This is clearly some sort of insult towards women considering how disgusting soft eggs and mayonnaise get in the Texas heat!

3 "..I Have To Decline Because It Doesn't Sound Like Something I'll Enjoy"

If there's one thing we can learn from this article, it's that Sheldon Lee Cooper drops a lot of truth bombs. He is as honest as it gets—there is no lying. Probably because Sheldon can't tell a lie, but that's for another day.

After the gang invites Amy and Sheldon out, instead of saying he has laundry or needs to get up early the next morning, he tells it how it is; "Thank you, for the invitation but I have to decline because it doesn't sound like something I'll enjoy." While most people should be commended for this kind of honesty, Sheldon is more likely to get the side-eye or some kind of remark about being rude. But when we really think about it—what's more rude: telling a lie about not going, or being honest about not wanting to go? Sheldon wins.

2 "Was That The Motto Of Your Community College?"

It's no surprise that Penny didn't graduate college. The Big Bang Theory brings that fact up more than a few times. She did start taking a few classes here and there through seasons, but we never really heard what happened with it once she got her job as a salesperson. One would think that Penny getting a career and an actual salary would make the gang lay off a bit. Maybe for most of them, but not from Sheldon. No matter what career Penny has or how much money she's making, he'll never drop the fact that she attended community college. (God Forbid it's not M.I.T.) And since Penny is a free thinker and does things at the seat of her pants, she couldn't clash more with the theoretical physicist.

When she tries to relax Sheldon by saying "...Not knowing is part of the fun," Sheldon had different thoughts; "'Not knowing is half the fun.' Was that the motto of your community college?" We're trying not to laugh, because we feel bad for Penny, but how can we not!

1 "What Can I Say? She Enjoys My Genitals"

C'mon, you know we had to save this one for number one! Sheldon handed in a lousy piece of work to his co-worker, Barry Kripke. Kripke was taken back by Sheldon's work and was disappointed in the outcome. In short; he expected better from the great Sheldon Cooper. Before Sheldon could defend his work or explain himself, Kripke assumes Sheldon's work was that poor because he was too busy making love to Amy. And we really can't deny Barry's train of thought. Our mind does get a tad sloppy when we're love drunk. But, considering this is Sheldon Cooper we're talking about, this man doesn't really sleep with his girlfriend (except for birthdays). To defend his poor work, he agrees with Kripke and explains he can't sleep at night because he's constantly getting laid. "What can I say? She enjoys my genitals." Oh Sheldon, I'm sure Amy would enjoy your genitals if she ever got them!

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