It can be a rough world out there when you’re all alone and feeling the struggle. Nothing makes everything seem so much easier than when you have a little flashy status. And what better way to have flashy status than dating a celebrity!
Now, by “dating” we mean they think they are on a date, or that they think they are in a real relationship or that they are dating someone they THINK looks like a celebrity. Unfortunately, in all of these cases, the status seeking lonely heart is either constructing a flimsy lie easily exposed, is sadly mistaken or hopelessly delusional.
But hey, that shouldn’t stop us from laughing, ahem, we mean learning from their mistakes, right?
15 “Katy Perry” and the Real Katy Perry
Poor Spencer Morrill. Spencer met who he thought was Katy Perry on the internet, and had an online relationship with her for six years. This culminated in him appearing in an episode of the hit MTV series Catfish.
Of course, this story has a terrible ending. On the show they revealed that the woman he was actually interacting with was a prankster from Gloucester, England known only as Harriet. Harriet apologized, and to his credit, Spencer seemed to take it well.
Katy Perry found out later and said, “You know, like, my heart goes out to him actually, because anybody that’s been fooled like that or just, you know, people have dreams, and people live in different parts of the world where not everything is always so accessible.”
Class act, Katy. As for you, Harriet? You’re a horrible person.
14 Tila Tequila
Tila Tequila became one of the first social media celebrities online, getting her big start on MySpace. She showed a lot of skin, did a lot of vlogs and tried to get a music, modeling and acting career started. Like many in the spotlight, she started to self destruct in weird ways, becoming a vocal Hitler supporter (yikes) and getting kicked off of Celebrity Big Brother.
Point is—this girl made a huge splash. This guy is a complete moron to think can convince us that this is his girlfriend “Brianna.” His female friend shut him down when she says, “You really stepped up your game since Thursday when you were dm’ing me asking if I’d have s*x with you because your 21st birthday is coming up and you don’t want to be a virgin. Well done Matt.”
Someone get him to the burn unit!
13 Peter Dinklage
Well here’s an interesting one. These two ladies thought this little person was Peter Dinklage. Now according to our research, we can definitely confirm this is not true. This research mostly consists of having two fully functioning eyeballs that have also seen all seven seasons of Game of Thrones. We know what Peter Dinklage looks like.
But that didn’t stop this guy from taking advantage of the situation. “Peter Dinklage? Yes. Yes, that is definitely my name.” And then he bought them each an “adult beverage.” Because that’s what his character on Game of Thrones does. He drinks and he knows things.
We don’t know how the night ended up, but we’re sure it involved chicken fights on top of fire-breathing dragons.
12 Rob "Blob" Kardashian
Hollywood is a weird place, and some people will do absolutely anything to get attention. That includes pretending to date a celebrity who is barely a celebrity just to help you launch your brand.
Mehgan James doubled her social media following in a week by claiming that she and Rob Kardashian were dating. She even had a publicity team that contacted multiple media outlets to “leak” the fake story.
Except it was all complete BS. TMZ confirmed Bob Kardashian staunchly denied the rumors and the story fell flat like a C-list celebrity soufflé. But that didn’t stop her from posing in nothing but fishnet stockings, a thong and socks that say “Classy [CENSORED]”
We would say it’s pretty crass to piggy-back your brand off the Kardashians but…who are we kidding, we’re doing it too.
What’s creepy about this photo is that by the way this dude is dressed, it looks like he’s actually trying to impersonate Macklemore. That’s like exactly how he’s dressed in his famous 2012 video Thrift Shop. Well, not exactly. But it’s very Mackelmore-esque. The hair is pretty close, and those sunglasses obscure his facial features just enough to pass. As long as he keeps talking to a minimum, he’s probably going to get away with this.
The fact that they’re at a music festival can only help with the deception. Throw in a few hours of loud music, drinks and hallucinogenic drugs and he’ll probably have them believing they’re shooting on of his videos right now. Look at these girls. They’re elated! Just be careful ladies. We’re not sure we like that he’s holding your drinks.
10 Justin Bieber, part 1
Jill is obsessed with Justin Bieber. We don’t personally understand the depth of attraction everyone seems to have for him, but then again, some of us have never been a fourteen year old girl. Maybe someday.
We think it’s kind of sweet that Jill thinks her boyfriend looks so much like her idol. So sweet, and so delusional. This guy looks nothing like Bieber. He’s blonde, but that’s about it. His hairline is receding already and he looks like he weighs about 90 lbs. So yeah, maybe when Bieber was 14 there might be a little more in common.
But there’s no way this guy could impersonate Bieber can get away with it. But she still thinks so. Love is blind—for some people to have a chance it has to be.
9 Justin Bieber, part 2
Woah. Is this girl Olivia even old enough to kiss Bieber? She looks like she’s nine. And we’re not entirely sure when this was taken, but it looks like at least five years back. Olivia posts a completely unbelievable and in no way realistic shopped photo. The angles are off and the lighting is from two different sources and angles. It’s awful—it makes her skin look like she has jaundice.
Incredibly, some of her friends buy it! But it only takes one to start the revolt. Betul says, “wait but didn’t he cut his hair? …WHAT’S HIS PHONE NUMBER???!?!” :D :D:D
Olivia has a mini breakdown when she sputters in defense, “I’m not telling you cus then you will tell everyone and everyone will bother me so know and my mum said not to tell anyone.” Yeah, leave Olivia and Beebs alone!
8 Justin Bieber, part 3
Aw. We find it adorable when full grown men have crushes on Bieber. We find it less adorable when their Photoshop skills just aren’t up to par. The lighting, though off, is actually pretty close. It’s just the outline that’s the dead give away. The beeb’s hair outline was clearly shopped, which means his whole image was pasted onto the background.
Though miles better than Olivia’s attempt at photographic trickery in the previous entry, this guy still isn’t ready for the Major Leagues of lying about meeting celebrities. And let’s be honest, grown men that are obsessed Beebs secretly want to date him. He wants you to believe that this is a date.
Maybe someday, dude.
7 Tayane Leao, Brazilian supermodel
Tayane Leao. That name may not ring a lot of bells in North America, but in Brazil she’s a famous supermodel. Back in 2009, she won the Supermodel of the World final, a big honor for Brazil. She’s fairly well known internationally and has a huge internet presence.
But if you’re an idiot that’s lazy about his research and happens to grab the first picture of a pretty face he sees on Google, you wouldn’t know that. Only after your friends call you out on Facebook for pretending to date an international supermodel will you come to realize you’re just the worst at making up stories. We have very little pity for you, dude. Next time, try to find an imaginary girlfriend that’s not so out of your league.
6 Mike Tyson
Well, not a lot of back-story on this one, but these girls apparently went out on the town and met who they thought was Mike Tyson. So they spent the evening partying with him.
Now, let’s be honest. Real talk. He doesn’t really look like Mike Tyson at all. Sure, he’s African-American, and he does have the same tattoo on his face. But that’s it.
Something tells us that the facial recognition skills of these women were severely hampered by whatever they were drinking. We can’t confirm that but it seems like a pretty safe bet. Whoever this actually ended up being was probably amused by the whole situation. We can picture him saying something like, “That’s ok, ladies. All drunken girls look the same to me too.”
5 A room full of “stars”
British magician Paul Stockman decided to supercharge his marketing and PR by getting photos taken with some of his favorite celebrity friends. He has photos of Sarah Michelle Gellar, Tony Bennet, George Michael, Simon Cowell and Ricky Gervaise. The way he poses with Gellar makes it seem like they know each other almost intimately, with her leaning up against him.
Except, it’s all complete BS. These aren’t stars. These aren’t even human beings—these are wax figures of stars. Stockman posed himself with these figures to make it seem he’s in high demand and he travels in those circles. For a self-described “mentalist”, he isn’t doing a very good job of fooling anyone. Isn’t that supposed to be his job? If you can’t trick us in a photo, how you going to trick us in a live performance on stage? Seems dicey.
4 Bow Wow
Keyonnah had been online messaging with rapper Bow Wow for at least four months before she decided to appear on the show that breaks everyone’s soul, MTV’s Catfish. She was convinced she was going to buck the trend and she was actually going to meet Bow Wow.
Alas, it was not to be. We know it’s shocking for a show like Catfish, but it wasn’t Bow Wow! Nope! In actuality it was a lesbian woman named Dee. They asked her, “So you kind of created the profile as a trap in a way to meet girls?” And she replied, “Yeah, to meet girls. To meet a lot of girls,” Dee said. “I know Bow Wow, he gets that attention. All the girls love him.”
Two layers of deception: not Bow Wow, and also not a man. Keyonnah wanted nothing to do with it.
3 Super top secret celebrity
Donny is freaking hilarious. If he knew we were laughing at him, he’d be crying, but he’s so horrible at this he would kind of deserve it. He’s trying to pull of multiple lies at the same time here. He wants us to believe:
His curious friends ask the obvious questions, “Oh, ok. What’s her name, man?”
Donny says, “for legal purposes I cannot disclose her name.” Oh, Donny’s a spy now. Now his friends let him have it, “My lie-o-meter is off the charts.” And, “Excellent Photoshop, Donny!” Followed by, “HAHAHAHA,” which is one upped by “HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA”
Oh, Donny. Pass us a shot of that Smirnoff and tell us another whopper.
2 Michael Phelps
What’s wrong with people’s eyes? That’s not Michael Phelps. For comparison, we put a photo of the real Michael Phelps next to him. The real Phelps has a gazillion gold models hanging off of him and cartoonishly floppy ears. Hey, he’s adorable.
This guy just isn’t a very convincing Phelps. As for the woman—we recommend getting the prescription to your glasses adjusted. But we suspect this little charade won’t be able to last too much longer. Once you manage to get his shirt off, even with bad eyes, you’re going to be able to tell by feel whether or not this an Olympic swimming gold medalist or not. But maybe at that point you won’t really care. It’s your life, we don’t judge. Much.
1 Date beautiful fake celebrities
So you’ll never be able to date George Clooney, or Ryan Gosling. You’re smart enough to know that you’ll ever be able to convince people that you are dating a celebrity through Photoshop or social media trickery. But you still really want to date a celebrity. So what do you do?
You go to the BeautifulPeople.com dating site and peruse their comprehensive collection of celebrity lookalikes! They have almost everyone you could possibly want, and some of these people are dead ringers! What’s that you ask? What about their personalities? Who cares! It’s what they look like that’s important to you, let’s not kid ourselves. And hey, if they’re willing to play along, you might just feel cool enough to momentarily cover up the truth: that you’re shallow and vapid and will never find happiness. But look, Tom Cruise!
Leave A Comment
Looking for an AD FREE EXPERIENCE on TheThings?Get Your Free Access Now!