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15 People Too Thick In The Head To Realize They Are Calling The Kettle Black

There’s something so satisfying about seeing someone destroy their own credibility by doing the exact thing that they claim to hate. And it’s often the people that are the loudest about condemning bad behavior that are the ones who are the most guilty.

Someone going off about “stupid” people? Probably not so bright himself. Someone that goes on about prejudice? Probably said quite a few questionable things in their feed. But not us. We can’t stand intolerant people.

Here are 15 people calling the kettle black.

15 No sympathy from me

via: failking.com

Well, 12 minutes ago, this poster had pretty strong opinions about people throwing pity parties for themselves on Facebook. “If you post depressing statuses, don’t expect any sympathy from me. That’s the last thing you’ll get.”

Strong words. This guy sounds like he’s tough as nails, with little tolerance toward anyone that expresses some vulnerability in their social media feed.

Except…

Three hours ago, on the very same day, he posted, “Fortunately I’ve forgotten how it feels to care, or even be cared for.”

Cringe and yikes. That’s a statement that’s begging for sympathy if we’ve ever heard it. So yeah, bro, we’re not buying your tough talk. You’re doing an all day fire sale at the discount sympathy clearinghouse, but clearly, no one is buying.

14 Amanda Bynes is not a spectacle

via: cheezburger.com

We’re all shaking our heads on this one. Here’s a popular online news source that makes tons of ad money off of sensational headlines about celebrities, then has the audacity to announce, “Amanda Bynes is Not a Spectacle, Let’s Stop Treating Her Like One.”

Meanwhile, over the past few weeks, this same publication is loaded with gossip about Amanda Bynes. Rumors about her mental health, things her mother says about her, what her Twitter feed says, when she left rehab and a hospitalization on psychiatric hold.

You’re right! She’s not a spectacle, so maybe you guys should stop writing sensational stories about her? Stop pretending you’re concerned about her well-being. It’s not a good look when you’re collecting fat checks from the advertisers. You’re worse than the tabloids—at least they don’t pretend to care.

13 Duckface

via: cheezburger.com

Good lord, do we hate duckface. Where exactly are the origins of duckface? No one seems to know. If they were making duckfaces in photos in the '80s and '90s, it sure as heck didn’t seem very prevalent. Nowadays it seems like an epidemic.

So sure, we appreciate the cartoon making a duckface with the caption “Am I s*xy yet?” Because, c’mon, duckface is not alluring.

But what’s this? The original poster’s friend Bethany points out that, “girl, aren’t you giving me duckface in your profile picture?” Brian piles on with words to similar effect. And sure enough, she is definitely making duckface.

So, OP, we’ll have to ask the question to you directly. When you pose like that, are you s*xy yet? Hold on right there, we’ll just answer that for you. Heck no.

12 I’m not drinking again for at least 4 hours

via: cheezburger.com

Four hours ago, this gentleman boldly proclaims, “never drinking hard alcohol again.” Boy, have we been there. Double-digit shots of birthday tequila and…let's just say the next three days did not go smoothly. Alcohol induced misery can feel like the flu, but worse—a virus didn’t do it to you, you did it to yourself.

But looks like the misery only cut skin deep because this guy is ready to put on his party pants and drinking helmet to start the whole process over again. “Another night of drinking? I think yes!” Well…looks like you’re a little too thick in the skull to let hours of head-pounding pain teach you anything.

See you at the bottom of that bottle! Or gutter. Whichever comes first?

11 Don’t drink and preach

via: dailymail.co.uk

This is among the most spectacularly bad hypocrisy failures in this list, in that it actually made the newspapers and endangered lives. Lyn Knapton, a drinking and drugs counselor, caused a six-car pileup, thousands of dollars worth of damage and risked the lives of others during a horrible DUI accident.

The thing she is paid professionally to help others NOT do, she got caught doing herself. She was jailed for 12 weeks and certainly served her time. She is lucky it wasn’t far, far worse.

We can only hope that the drinking and drug counselor assigned to her was better at it than she was. It would be horrifically ironic if the “sober” people designated to fix the “drunk” problem were the ones downing shots at the bar before their appointments.

10 I’m all about love. Except for you, Madonna

via: ruinmyweek.com

We think Sean’s first statement is actually quite admirable: “Promote what you love instead of bashing what you hate.” Yeah! Talk about the things in life that you enjoy, instead of being a hater about all the things you don’t. If everyone followed that line of thinking, the internet would be a much more pleasant place. Live and let live, and like what you like.

Of course, he immediately screws this up. “I honestly hate Madonna. Talentless b****. She needs to go away. Ugh.”

Um…didn’t you just say…?

Colin good-naturedly ribs him, “You just posted about how you hate Madonna…hahaha.”

Sean is busted but sticks to his guns, “I know lol, But seriously that’s a different story lol.” How is it different? C’mon dude. Quit your bull, we all see how you really are.

9 Stop it

via: iheartchaos.com

It’s either a clever joke, or an oblivious plea for conservation or both. We’re not actually sure. Using three sheets of paper to tell people to stop wasting paper is like having an office meeting to tell people to stop scheduling frivolous office meetings.

A case can be made that perhaps the sign poster used three signs to capture the most possible attention and viewed this three-sheets waste as an acceptable sacrifice in the long run. But then we think we might be reading too much into it. Will we ever find out? Who knows—he’s probably the troll in the next room printing signs in white text on black background warning workers not to waste toner. This is what happens to people in an eight-hour day when they run out of work to do at 11 a.m.

8 This is you getting judged on your personality

via: ruinmyweek.com

In theory, we can get behind the Mack’s first statement. He says, “I respect BLIND people. Because they judge others by their PERSONALITLY (sic) and not by their LOOKS. Only if people with eyes did this sh** to. (sic)”

Problem is, if you’re going to make a sweeping statement like this, you better not have a reputation for being cruel to others based on surface observations. And who else would know but your Facebook friends? And, lo and behold, they call you out in about five minutes.

“Says the person who called me a f***ing girl today because of my hair. I f***ing hate people like you.”

Here’s his chance to apologize. But instead, Mack shows his true colors: “Truth hurts bro deal with it.”

Oh, Mack. You blew it, buddy. We kind of hate you, too.

7 Classy update

via: cheezburger.com

The ADD of some social media addicts is SO hardcore. You can’t take 45 seconds at the urinal to yourself without dragging your whole social media following into your private time? Hope you wash your phone after you wash your hands.

We’re not sure which is worse. The guy breaking up with his significant other while doing his business at the urinal or the guy next to him in the other urinal live-posting about it. Honestly, a toss up.

Live-posting guy ends his denunciation of break-up guy with “stay classy.” His friend Rawley isn’t having it: “as classy as a status update at the urinal?”

Buuuurrn. Haha. There’s only one thing you should be looking down on at the urinal, and it isn’t the guy’s behavior next to you.

6 I’m sorry, what?

via: cheezburger.com

“Nothing like finding two guys ur dating in bed with other girls OMFG.”

Take a minute to let that seep in—that this girl is upset that two guys she has a relationship with at the same time also have relationships with other girls.

We’re not clear what she’s trying to say here. That she can date multiple guys at once but the guys can’t? That it’s OK when she does it, but it’s some kind of moral crime if they do it?

Sounds to us like she’s just playing the field and being a single girl. Nothing wrong with that, but she shouldn’t expect all of her boy toys to just sit around while she makes a decision.

If you’re gonna get greedy, don’t be surprised if you catch someone else dipping into your stash.

5 Samantha is mature

via: cheezburger.com

We remember when we were 16 and thought we knew everything. And 16 is, you know, mature. You definitely know all the ways of the world at that age. At least until you hit 17.

So we can tell by her post that she’s upset with people acting immature all the time. “We’re not little kids anymore, you can’t keep acting like a jack-*ss the whole time…”

True words, you smart, wizened sage. And how exactly were you behaving earlier on Facebook? Let’s take a look at a previous post…

“JOEY LINGFLTER TALKED SH** ABOUT MY GIRL…na f****r, I don’t play that little b***h *ss game. I’M UPLOADING YOUR D*** PIC TO FACEBOOK. F*** YOU B****.” And so forth.

Let’s all bask in the serenity and maturity of this wise 16-year-old. What a delight she is.

4 Guess he changed his mind

via: cheezburger.com

It’s too bad so many people invalidate actual good advice by something they say later. When people post something that you think is a great idea or a sensible way to live life, it just ruins it when you realize they’re completely full of it.

Like this little saying “If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.” Hey, that makes sense, we can get behind that. No one wants to hang around someone who constantly complains and doesn’t do anything to change his or her situation or their state of mind about the situation.

But then he destroys it a mere one day later when he posts, “I’ve never liked change…” What? But you just…you said…sigh. We guess he changed his mind.

We can’t even.

3 Put your cell phone down

via: ruinmyweek.com

Technology is pretty freaking cool these days. The phones in our pockets are more powerful than the machines we used to get to the moon. And we can be in contact with anybody, at any time. So it’s understandable that many of us are addicted to our devices.

This person makes an excellent point about taking a break from your cell phones and communicating with actual live human beings. And it would be a point well taken…if he didn’t post this on social media...using a cell phone.

Honestly, the best place to have this conversation is with people at a social gathering or at a restaurant or tavern—a lot of those people are totally glued to their phones. And have it face to face. Otherwise, dude, you’re just the same as the people you’re complaining about.

2 Dear internet, stop paying attention to me

via: ruinmyweek.com

Shanice sounds a little upset when she posts, “sick of getting sh** from everyone if you don’t like me delete me I don’t care anymore.”

Shanice seems to be missing the perspective that people who really “don’t care anymore” wouldn’t be posting about this on Facebook. Her friend Charlie is sharp and points this out. And notes that this is a hypocritical post.

So then Shanice doubles-down with an F-bomb. “It isn’t hypercritical (sic) at all, f*** off.”

Truly spoken like someone who’s stopped caring. Now she’s getting her socks in a twist because Charlie, a guy she doesn’t know well, rightfully points out that she obviously DOES care.

We don’t think Shanice will ever understand the clear message that Charlie was trying to deliver. But it’s important to her to prove she doesn’t care.

1 Getting married young

via: ruinmyweek.com

Some people are so thick they don’t even realize they are being called out for being a hypocrite. If you act confused when called out about it—you’re high on your own supply of B.S.

This young man or woman got married early in life, but is criticizing people for…getting married early in life. When a friend points out, “Didn’t you get married young?” The original poster replies, “Yes, but I got divorced a year later so I don’t get it.”

What is there not to get? You can’t remember why you got married early? Or that people sometimes make mistakes? Be honest—you haven’t come to terms with your own mistakes, so you’re going to keep calling them out in others. You’re as bad as those list article writers.

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15 People Too Thick In The Head To Realize They Are Calling The Kettle Black