For decades, church signs have been used to decades to communicate what is going on in that particular faith-based community. Whether it is the sermon of the day, the scripture text the members are currently studying, profound quotes or an upcoming event's details—these signs have served as the message boards of their sanctuaries long before social media. However, there are times when the messages these signs bear are not about faith, but are so relatable and funny. Whether they're hilarious remarks about the weather, faith jargon combined with popular sayings or thoughts that you agree with, which force you to stop and snap a pic, here are 15 great church signs that you have got to see.
15 You are going to need that air conditioning where you are headed
It is an honest human response to get all the feels when something is stolen from us. We have all felt that gut-wrenching, stomach-sinking feeling when we realize that something we own has been taken from us. It's a feeling that goes from shock and fear to outright anger. But, this church sign takes this feeling a step further. This church sign makes it very clear about how the church feels about the villainous person who took it upon him or herself to snatch up this poor house of worship's air conditioning units. And they also make it very clear what the consequence of robbing a church is—eternal damnation. Air conditioning thieves, beware.
14 Maybe we should start reading those
It is a rare and industrious person who consistently takes the time to read through the terms and conditions, especially when it comes to things such as the ever constant phone updates or rewritten conditions. Like really, you guys who do that are the real MVPs as far as responsibility and successful adulting goes. But for the rest of us, let's get real for a minute. Apple users, come on, who actually reads all of the Terms and Conditions? Well, this sign makes us rethink our bad (read: LAZY behavior). After all, that whole apple debacle really did not work well for Adam and Eve (or the rest of humanity), did it?
13 Here is your sign to not text and drive
We have all been behind that one person who STILL texts and drives and have lived to tell the horrendous tales. Unfortunately, these avid phone users adamantly refuse to appeal to reason (or commercials and laws) and STILL choose to text while trying to successfully operate a vehicle. And if you are the avid texter, most of us other motorists will agree that there are very few lives worth your "what's up?" text. Even if the message is urgent, there are ways to respond without causing a multi-car pile up. There are so many fancy advancements that allow us to call people hands-free on our phones or simply make a request from our steering wheel to call the person instead of texting when you should be driving. This sign seems to agree.
12 The church agrees that a happy wife is a happy life
There are certain truths that just ring eternal. We have all heard the saying "Happy wife, happy life." There are many husbands that will testify to this wise saying's truth—the happier the wife is, the happier the husband's life will be. Therefore, all the hubs, hubbies and hubbykins out there should take note of this sage advice. Yet, there will still be those out there who will question such wise advice (newbs), especially when it comes down to a wife's decision-making skills. And that truth is echoed on this wise church's message board. Here's the thing, people: the saying does not mean that the wife is always right, but it does mean watch what she's talking about. That whole woman's intuition thing is kind of real.
11 The only time a church has ever told people to stop praying
This will probably be one of the very few times you ever really hear about a church requesting that someone stops their prayers...and rightly so! This winter has been particularly brutal, burying many of us under inches (and in some places, FEET) of snow. And in some cases, it seems like the snow has been unrelenting with weekly—and in some unfortunate spots, daily—bouts of the white stuff. Imagine some kid somewhere who keeps praying for more and more snow and each week, that prayer gets answered. While that small human is rejoicing in days off or delayed days in school, the rest of us are forced to muddle through the winter madness. Yes, for all our sakes, kid, please stop praying for snow.
10 Literally hot as hell
Well, if all that snow did not get you, this weather board/ church sign will. We do not know too many people who would not choose a warm weather day over a frigid one at any time. And summer can be awesome. All of the pool parties, beach days, baseball, fun in the sun, early days and late sunsets are things most of us enjoy. That is, until that fun is eclipsed by a heatwave that either forces you to the respite of the air-conditioned indoors or to face the horror of sunburn, heat exhaustion and sweating like a sinner in church (see what we did there?). This sign is a pleasant surprise and its humor makes intolerably hot days a little more tolerable.
9 Time to stop complaining about those grey hairs
Let's face it—getting old is not something the majority of us are super excited about. Typically, our minds go to the negative sides of aging: the wrinkles, the sagging skin, the exhaustion, the metabolism slowing down and the like. How many commercials, ads, program announcements and subverted messages are we bombarded with daily that advertise the latest anti-aging product? However, this church board questions that socially accepted norm. Aging is more than something most of us do on a daily basis from the moment we are born until our very last breath. Aging is a privilege and not everyone gets to do it. This is a very visual reminder that maybe we need to change our view of getting older.
8 Watch what you tweet
It does not take a sociologist to tell you that social media is the most prominent way that people these days communicate and express themselves. These tools allow us to share common ideas and goals, stunning visuals, compelling messages and the like, even if through a different language (thank God for the TRANSLATE button) with those around the world.
Social media allows us to show the best of ourselves. However, social media can also show the worst of us. Twitter is a place where both of these collide. Literally, in one profile, you can have Nobel Peace Prize-worthy posts and inane chilling rants within one scroll of another. This sign reminds us of the golden rule, updated for modern times.
7 Practical application
Speaking of time-honored scripture getting the 21st entry update, here is another (sort of). We are a people glued to our phones. We use it for everything from getting a ride to turn-by-turn directions to posting an inspirational quite or our most ridiculous selfie and finding the latest recipe or to order dinner (all without having to talk to an actual human being). All this hassle-free info finding and sharing is awesome, but many have observed that the lack of actual interaction with actual people is starting to reduce our face-to-face social skills. Not cool. This sign addresses that lack. This is a church's way of reminding those of us who live in the era of the iPhone to love one another as we love our phones. #allyouneedislove #andwifi
6 Well maybe...
Anyone else notice the serious lack of positivity lately? Not sure if it is because we are more connected than ever, therefore we get the bad news faster and more regularly than previous generations, or if there is actually more bad things happening. But, when saturated enough, it could make a person become more negative about the world if they are not careful. This particular sign is interesting because most of us remember a time when those in the churches used to be the first of those condemning this world (and everyone not like them) to hell.
Yet, this sign is a gentle reminder to think the best, even during the worst times. It reminds us to think positively, even when there is so much negativity and to be kind, even if there is so much meanness in the world.
5 Another commandment to honor
All of us know a person who could benefit from this one (and if you do not, you are probably the one who could benefit from this advice the most). At some point in our lives, we are going to face pains. Whether it is the deep, soul-aching pain caused by the death of a loved one or the loss of a relationship, a nuisance pain like a toothache or the necessary pain caused post workout or surgery—we will all experience pain. This sign is a blunt (and tweetable) reminder to not be the one who causes (or inflicts) pain on anyone, even if you yourself are going through pains. Let the church say "amen."
4 A question for the ages
We all have questions about our beliefs. Some of those questions are super deep and serious. Others of those questions are light and, well, just funny. And church-goers are no exception. Many a Sunday School teacher could tell you a few that will have you LOL'ing for sure. Was Jesus' favorite food grilled fish? How did the people on the other side of the Red Sea respond to its parting by Moses...and does Moses part his hair the same way? Those are some examples, but the one on this sign really takes the cake. Equal parts funny and practical; so many of us still really wish Noah had just squashed those pesky mosquitoes.
3 One is usually a sign of the other
Every faith system has something to say about what we say, including this one. Have you ever met a person who just had to say something? In fact, this person's compulsion for verbal vomit was so great, that they often ended up with more trouble than they were looking for (again, if you can't think of any one like that, you might be that person and this is your sign). You ever notice how much value is placed on what they have to say? Not much, and that is usually because there was little to no thought put into it. Conversely, think of that person who always says the right thing at the right time. That is usually because they have thought about it. Thus, there is a corresponding relationship between the amount you flap your gums versus the thoughtfulness of what you say. And this sign reminds us of that.
2 Does sexual healing count as a Biblical miracle?
Wow, this church gets straight to the point, do they not? There is a lot of freedom in church attendance. There are many churches (some cities have one on every corner). There are many different times to go to church, from six a.m. worship to midnight prayer service. There are many things to wear to church, from full on choir robe to distressed jeans and t-shirts. There are many ways of going to church, too, from simply attending your local service or even live streaming (and the possibility of a virtual church is not to far on the horizon.) But what does not count as attending church? Apparently the activity being described very candidly on this church's message board. No, y'all, "Sexual Healing" is not in the morning selection and there was not (to our knowledge) any time Marvin Gaye was a bishop, pastor, or priest (nice try).
1 The blessing of common sense
There are many elements of faith that require, well, faith. There is not any faith system that is devoid of its stories, tenants and pillars that require us to believe even when you do not know, trust even when you have doubts and cling to time-honored words even in a super modern society. However, one thing most faiths will not contend with is common sense. This sign is a perfect example of that truth. It makes perfect sense to a faithful person to trust as much as you can in God, while still taking the precautionary, practical and wise steps to do the things in your life that will make life easier and simpler. You know, like locking your car.