The holiday season can be one of the most magical and memorable times of the year, or so we thought. Seems like between letters to Santa, A Charlie Brown Christmas, Rudolph, Frosty and all of the fireworks we could stand, a lot of us grew up with the magical perception of the holidays that, almost as soon as we became adults, melted away like your snowman did when spring finally arrived. Whether it is the minor annoyance of a poorly timed cold or the FOMO of having no plans for the holidays, you're not alone in your holiday struggles. Here are some of Whisper's most non-jolly, yet relatable confessions, that will make you think your end-of-the-year celebrations came straight out of a movie.
16 Buying gifts for grown ups
Christmas shopping can be a lot of fun, depending upon who you are shopping for. Kids seem to be everyone's favorite group to buy for (even though we give the gift credit to that fat man in the red suit.) However, for those of us who do not have any small people to buy for, there is always that other group to buy for: other adults. Yet, this poor soul is dreading spending his/her hard-earned cash on grown people. Maybe he/she is tired of gifting to presumptuous or greedy grown people, who, unlike most kids, have the ability to buy whatever they want for themselves. Maybe this person is a modern day Scrooge, simply being a cheapskate during the season of giving. Whether you think this person has a really good point or this person could be the human form of the Grinch, one thing is clear: shopping for grown-ups is not as fun as gifting to kids.
15 Being bad at gifting
Finding the perfect gift for the one you love is the ultimate Christmas shopping thrill. When you know exactly what he or she wants and you find it for him or her, it adds a whole other level to "the joy of giving." But, what if you do not know what to get your sweetheart? That sweet excitement that makes waiting for Christmas Day almost unbearable turns into sheer panic that the gift you may give your boo thang may not be something they even like. And God forbid, you give a gift that makes it look like you simply do not care. You might as well not have given a gift at all. This poor gifter is where we all have been—that place between giving a bad gift, and giving a gift that makes you look like you do not care. Best of luck on that whole candy bit.
14 The awkward gift
One of the best things about the holiday season is receiving a gift you know will make your life better. Whether it is something practical, something for work, or something that will help you in a hobby, a thoughtful gift is always exciting. But, what if it's not exactly thoughtful in the way you would like it (like the gift above)? Uh, talk about a stocking stuffer. Leave is to Spencer's gifts to (attempt to) put the sexy into the holidays. Let's be honest: a Christmas-colored vibrating sex toy is not exactly what many of us would think of when we think of "Santa's little helper." This might be funny to some, but most of us would consider this an awkward gift to receive, depending upon who the gifter was. Sure, this would be hilarious as a gift from a girlfriend or as something you knew was a gag gift, but what about if someone was to gift this to you at the office holiday party? Or in a mean-spirited way? Yikes!
13 The tallest elf
Around this time of year, those who celebrate the season start to get into the Christmas spirit. This fun, holiday spirit can pop up anywhere, especially at a good house party. From "ugly sweaters" to elf hats, once you are bitten by the Christmas bug, the only cure is some form of holly, jolly expression.
But what happens when you are trying to get into the spirit, and your own body prevents the jingle bell fun? Enter this poor tall soul. At six and a half feet tall, maybe the Christmas elf hat was not the way to go. This guy already has to duck in low door frames, and, let's face it, this elf hat is not exactly the most compact piece of Christmas party flair. It is safe to assume that reindeer antlers are out of the question as well. Maybe next year, he should just stick to the ugly sweater.
12 Not the vodka kiss you had in mind
New Year's Eve is an exciting holiday on its own. The crowds, the parties and the fireworks all make for a great time. Add in the sweet tradition of kissing someone you love between the time when midnight strikes and after the ball drops and New Years Eve becomes a romantic holiday to remember. Not everyone will get to engage in this romantic tradition, however. Take, for example, this Whisper confessor. This confessor feels that the only oral action he is getting this New Years will be placing his lips, not to the warm lips of a sweet lover, but to the cold glass opening of a shot of vodka. Well, we can all probably think of worse ways to spend New Year's Eve.
11 Exam weak
The holidays can definitely be a fun time full of reunions, get-togethers and straight up, booty poppin' parties. But when you are a student in college, the holiday season happens to be either preceded or (in the case of this poor student), followed by these awful torture exercises known as "final exams." What are all of the days between Christmas dinner and New Years Eve to an engrossed student but a time to cram and study? What are the fireworks, cheers and noisemakers of New Years Eve to a university student but inescapable noise and an auditory reminder of how much being in this particular class stinks? Well, for all of the students out there, think of it this way: your graduation party will be slamming!
10 Unhappy New Year
Celebrating New Years Eve with your spouse is something most married people look forward to. Spending the final moments of another year in each other's loving embrace and kissing your sweetheart into the first moments of a brand new year is something a lot of married couples aim for and look forward to. However, not all couples are thinking of being with each other for the holiday. In fact, thinking about the new year has made this particular married person either arrive at the conclusion that he or she is not happy, or get the courage to do something about it. Well, look at it this way—at least this person has their first resolution ready.
9 That's one way to pay the holiday bills
The holiday season, with all of the gift giving, party throwing and traveling that comes along with the numerous festivities, is a very expensive time of year to say the least. For extra cash, a lot of us snag another job (maybe working at the mall, selling items online, or even babysitting). However, this Whisper confessor is seriously considering a different way to make fast cash after the holiday bank-draining season. That is right—this confessor is considering exotic dancing, specifically stripping. No shade on the ladies (or gentlemen) who grace the mirrored stages, lap dancing chairs and shining poles of the exotic dancing industry, but that is certainly one way to earn some quick cash (and consider the workout benefits). Don't let those morals get in the way of padding your poor depleted account!
8 The not-so-happy tradition
The holidays are a time to gather close with those whom you love, or at least those you mildly like (especially New Years Eve). We mean, think about it! You are literally spending the last moment of the old year and the first moments of a brand new year with these people. So ideally, you would want to be with fun (or at the very least, safe) people (whether they be friends, family or a significant other). However, this lamenting Whisper user is experiencing a three-year run of the worst of holiday scenario: spending the holidays alone. The same joy and fun of enjoying each other's company can twist into the soul-crushing loneliness of spending Christmas and New Years without anyone. Our hope is that none of you have to experience that.
7 The New Years surprise
We are all looking forward to something on New Years Eve. Some of us look forward to wearing fun outfits and partying like rock stars. Some of us look forward to heading down town or somewhere open to see fireworks. And some of us look forward to creating some fireworks of our own with our significant others. However, those plans can be completely trashed if you get a visit from the always poorly timed "Aunt Flo" bearing her own gifts of cramping, moodiness, weight gain as well as all of the messiness that accompanies menstruating. Our advice: drink lots of ginger ale, take a few pain killers, steer clear of the body cons and grab those expandable tampons to fit discretely in your clutch.
6 Rudolph, the red nose sick kid
Unless you are the one doing all of the hosting this year, the holidays are a time to do some serious house-hopping and party-bopping. With all of the events between Christmas and New Years Day, it is a wonder that we actually do get around to seeing everyone and doing all of the things on our list. All of that is enough to wear anyone out. But what about if you are sick during the holidays? Talk about FOMO! This poor person will be sick in bed at the risk of infecting every one of his family members during their Christmas festivities. Being sick over the holidays is enough to turn anyone into Scrooge. Talk about a Bah-Humbug!
5 The procrastinator
Christmas is a time of gift receiving and gift giving. We all can agree that proper gift shopping takes time and that we should start early. Some gift givers scour the internet and every local shop and store looking for the perfect gift. However, not all shoppers are like that. Some of us, whether from being indecisive, just realizing that Christmas is only a breath away, or loving the thrill of "crunch time," wait until the very last minute before getting our gift list done. We have all been there (or will be there in holiday seasons in the future). Enter this waiting wonder who decided to wait the week of Christmas to snag presents. Zero judgment and best of luck to you.
4 When Christmas gets real...
Christmas is definitely a time to spend with your family and show them how much you care (although, we should be doing that all year). But this isn't the case if your family has disowned you, as this Whisper user's family has. What could make a family disown a girl before Christmas? Looks like she is about to be a teen mom, which, understandably, is incredibly difficult, but definitely doable. However, this poor confessor will not even have her family to help her prepare for the coming baby, let alone to enjoy Christmas with her. Our hope is that the family changes their mind and that they and this Whisper user, in the spirit of the season, can be joyfully reconciled.
3 The answer to "Are you seeing anyone yet?"
The holidays may be fun, but a lot of us agree that they are better when spent with a boo-thang of your own. A lot of us will also agree that there is not very much fun in being asked about said boo-thang, when there is no boo-thang to begin with. Why is it that every holiday that your family gathers with you, whether it's Christmas or Thanksgiving (or even your birthday), someone (usually an older relative) asks about your love life? And they usually ask about it at the most inopportune time (in the middle of a meal or once everyone has gathered around). While being single during the holidays can suck in many ways, this pic is the perfect way to answer all of those who will be pointing your singleness out.
2 Lonely New Years Eve
The holidays are for spending time with family and friends. It is the perfect season for reunions, gatherings and fun functions of all kinds. But what about if you simply do not have anyone to spend the holidays with? What if all of your friends are leaving town or off to be with their loved ones? What if your own loved ones are far away? We have all spent a holiday or two alone. And it really does suck. But perk up, lonely buttercup, at least you can throw your very own New Years Eve party and not have to worry about someone drinking all of the champagne (or at the very least, sleep your way into the new year and catch those New Years Day sales before everyone else).
1 The gift that keeps on giving
The holiday season can get so real, so fast. The holidays can pull out both the worst and the best out of us. The same holidays that make for pleasant memories and fun stories to tell can also be the same holidays that cause us undue grief and frustration, from things as minor as not finding the right gift to family fights and arguments with your friends. It can be full of both painful reminders and joyful surprises. In this season of very low lows and super high highs, stability is something we all crave. Whether it is for a peaceful Christmas, or a jamming New Year's Eve, whether it's for fun-filled reunions, cozy cuddles, or meeting a new person during these wondrous winter weeks, we wish you guys a happy (and stable) holiday season.