Browsing thrift stores is always an adventure; most of the time shoppers can find excellent deals on really cool clothes that can’t be purchased at big retailers like TJ Maxx or super cute kitschy decorations for the home.
Then there are the times when thrift stores only seem to contain items designed to scare the bejeezus out of shoppers with their creep factor and probably need to be covered in salt before it even enters the home.
The following thrift store finds featured below will make anyone think twice about purchasing something they found without at least calling Sam and Dean Winchester for some tips on how to properly exorcise demons and use salt as a deterrent against evil spirits.
18 Toss This Into The Fires Of Mount Doom
This stuffed animal looks like it was conceived in the mind of someone that spent a little too much time watching horror movies.
If the body matched the head, it would be fine, but the baby’s face peering out from a kitten’s form is too unsettling for words. This stuffed animal is a creepy attempt at creating a chimera, which everyone knows never ends well in sci-fi or horror.
17 What Has Been Seen Cannot Be Unseen
Falkor, is that you? Pretty sure even the affable luck dragon from The Never Ending Story would be so pissed that some artist did a shitty job of adapting his likeness for a statue and spit blue flames at ‘em.
Some people just have no artistic talent, and whoever created this poor imitation of Falkor is one of them.
16 Haunted Doll Alert
Uhhhh, anyone else think that TAPS from the television show Ghost Hunters needs to come to this store to see if this doll is haunted?
Because seriously—the face is disfigured by markers and it has no arms or legs. This had to be the toy given to the son of the devil.
15 Tolkien's Ghost Says This Is An Abomination
As any Lisa Frank fan knows, unicorns are generally portrayed as being colorful, cute and snuggly. The candle maker clearly had a little too much fruit of the vine to drink before they sat down to make this abomination.
Looks like the artist forgot halfway through the process that they were supposed to create a unicorn, not a reclining buff manly-man.
14 Lord Voldemort's Childhood Toy
Seriously, what sort of demented mind came up with the chill-inducing idea of melding a toy baby and a child’s piano?
This toy looks like it should have been a prop in that Human Centipede movie because it’s just unsettling AF. Just nope, nope, nope—chuck that thing out now!
13 Kill It With Fire
Errrr…anyone know what this item is supposed to be? Besides utterly terrifying of course.
Not sure if it is a Christmas ornament created by a pair of demons as a prank on humans or if a possessed toddler decided to try his or her hand at arts and crafts before they started their reign of terror.
12 Picasso The Creator Is Not
Only Pablo Picasso could get away with doing eccentric artwork during the surrealism and post-impressionism periods and this artist certainly isn’t Picasso—or his reincarnation.
This honestly looks like someone half-asleep tried to paint a figurine of a vampire and made the worst color choices imaginable. Count Dracula is out there somewhere laughing hysterically at this.
11 What In The Bloody Hell Is This
This lamp looks as if it should have been a prop for The Haunting of Hill House, especially since the so-called “child” standing at the base has no freakin’ pupils. Just nope.
Anyone else want to bet that this figurine comes alive at night and walks away from the lamp in order to stare at sleeping humans?
10 Pennywise Wanted A Portrait
Folks that are afraid of clowns might want to avoid this thrift store in the future, especially since it appears that Pennywise the Clown had a professional portrait done in a further attempt to scare the inhabitants of Derry.
Clowns are creepy enough on their own, but adding foods traditionally associated with fall and the harvest ups the weirdness factor. Plus, that sly smile says that this clown is up to no good!
9 Leonardo DaVinci's Ghost Is Screaming Right Now
People stand in line for hours to see the portrait of the Mona Lisa, so it is perfectly understandable that an art fan would purchase a tiny replica to display in their own home—no lines, no muss, no fuss.
The addition of the seashell mouth and googly eyes though really add a new layer to the famous painting, although DaVinci’s ghost is off weeping in a corner somewhere because he never intended his beloved painting to become a subject of such puerile humor.
8 Sam And Dean Winchester Say That's A Demon, Not A Doll
Barbie Dolls generally aren’t creepy, but most porcelain dolls are downright unsettling especially since they’re often designed with eyes that appear to follow a person everywhere.
This doll is definitely the Queen of Creepy Dolls, hands down. The tongue sticking out and the fact that it appears that she has JET BLACK EYES with no pupils says that this creature comes to life at night and needs to be defeated by the Winchester brothers.
7 Don't Look Into Their Eyes
The stories of black-eyed children are numerous online; most of the legends often say the creepy kiddos are spotted panhandling on the side of the road or randomly show up on someone’s doorstep.
Not sure why anyone would risk having one of these creepy AF cryptid children knocking on their door demanding to be let in by purchasing this painting or even risking their wrath by making them subjects of a painting. Time to make a bonfire and toss this thing in there!
6 Mad Doctor Slash Scientist Ahoy
This figurine looks like it was stolen from a haunted hospital, like Waverly Hills Sanatorium in Kentucky. The way the doctor is yanking on the stethoscope is spine-tingling and gives off a hella bad vibe.
Let’s not even talk about the clown-like makeup and that weird smile. Chuck this into the trash bin and hope she doesn’t come after you.
5 Nightmares For Days Y'All
What sick puppy decided to make a vase designed to hold flowers in the shape of a PIG of all things and try to goth it up by ignoring the fact that pigs are generally pink-ish colored?
Those big ol’ googly eyes do absolutely nothing to soothe people’s fears that there might be a ghost attached to this vase.
4 The Artist Had To Be Half-Asleep While Making This
At first glance, it’s really difficult to tell what the heck these two things are supposed to be—they look more like hideous abominations than sea gulls.
Some sea shell art can be pretty, but the creator failed miserably at that. These two birds look like they’re going to shout “We come in peace” rather than teach Ariel how to comb her hair with a dingle hopper.
3 That's Definitely A Secret Cult's Idol
Not sure who this statue is even supposed to represent—it doesn’t look like any celebrity that is popular in this day and age.
Maybe it’s a secret cult’s idol and whoever is foolish enough to purchase this statue will find themselves the cult’s unwilling leader as they plan to kickstart the apocalypse.
2 An Ape Named Ape Says This Is Creepy AF
Just a guess, but this horrifying coconut ornament had to have been designed by George of the Jungle in honor of his BFF an Ape named Ape because only that particular dim-witted hero would be able to come up with something that should be in a scary flick.
The combination of those vivid green eyes and the red lipstick also makes this find spine-tingling—who knew apes could wear contacts and makeup?
1 Salem Is Giving This Book So Much Side-Eye
In recent years, it has become fashionable for dog owners to dye their furry friend’s floof all sorts of cool, bold (temporary) colors since dogs are pretty easy-going.
Cats though---cats have razor-sharp claws and would destroy the paintbrush PLUS your hand if you touched them when they don’t want you to. Painting a cat would be like taking your life in your own hands; how did the authors manage to live long enough to even create a book?
Sources: Thrifting Nightmares