Quick Links
Not long after Howard Stern became famous, he did something that other entertainers have been trying to emulate ever since... he made his parents famous.
On top of Ben and Ray Stern being part of The Howard Stern Show from time to time (in the studio, over the phone, and via impression) they also built up a fanbase of their own. Therefore, Stern Show listeners have been eager to find out what happened to his parents ever since they disappeared from the spotlight.
Throughout this year, Howard has been open about the health struggles both of his parents have faced, particularly his mother. But on September 6th, 2022, Howard formally announced that his father died at the age of 99.
What Did Howard Stern's Dad, Ben Stern, Die Of?
During the last few years of Ben Stern's life, he was dealing with a number of health issues. According to Howard, they included memory loss, a notable loss of weight, and general deterioration of his body. On top of this, Ben would thrash in his sleep, walk around screaming, and see things that just weren't there.
Despite Howard and his sister, Ellen, wanting him to pass away in his own home alongside his wife, the doctors advised that he be moved to a hospice. And this is where he finally went.
But on September 6th, Howard revealed that one of the reasons for his strange and speedy breakdown was actually cancer.
"My father, as it turned out, had prostate cancer and it has metastasized to his bones," Howard admitted on air.
While the doctors couldn't properly diagnose Ben for the longest time, they did end up figuring out that prostate cancer contributed to his passing.
Howard Stern's Relationship With His Dad
Anyone who has ever listened to Howard talk about his dad is more than aware that things weren't easy between them. Aside from Ben's love of yelling at his son, their biggest issue was the fact that they just couldn't connect.
While discussing the revelation that Ben Stern actually had a glass eye for most of his life, Howard revealed a poignant fact about their relationship.
"My father really didn't have the kind of relationship with me where he talked to me," Howard said to his audience and co-host Robin Quivers." We never had a substantive conversation. Nothing about his life. Never called me 'son'. Never asked, 'How are you?'. It was a very cold relationship."
This wasn't for lack of trying either. Howard has always been open about how he attempted to connect with Ben. At every turn, he tried to make things better between them. But Ben wasn't able to connect in the way Howard needed.
While this tended to give Howard some hilarious stories to tell on air, it also brought him great pain. He has cited his relationship with his father as one of the reasons he's been stuck in therapy for decades.
Howard Stern's Final Conversation With His Father
Any eulogy on The Howard Stern Show is going to be filled with comedy. And Howard's on-air statement about his dad was no different.
During the near-hour-long tribute, Howard found ways of making light of the fact that his mother refused to go say 'goodbye' to her husband until the very last minute, how she didn't end up going to the funeral, and even the heartbreaking final moment he had with Ben.
Howard described walking into Ben's hospice room to find a volunteer playing the clarinet. While Howard was blown away by the man's kindness, he couldn't help but make fun of the fact that Ben hated the sound of the clarinet. But Ben couldn't speak. Couldn't move. And therefore was trapped listening to music he likely would've hated.
There's no denying the hilarious truth in a moment like that.
But Howard found less comedic truths in the final moments with his father.
"A lot of people had advised me that, even the doctors said to me, 'If you want, just sit alone and have the conversation you need to have with him, even though he can't talk back'," Howard said.
"They said, 'Feel free to pull up a chair next to his bed and hold his hand'. And I said, 'Oh, f***, I don't think I've ever held my father's hand'. I'm so damaged as a human being as a result of the way I was raised that it wouldn't have even occurred to me to hold my father's hand. That would not register that that's something people do," Howard admitted.
Howard then went on to explain that he got "really uncomfortable" during his final interaction with his dad.
"I pulled up the chair. I held his hand," Howard claimed before saying he tried to tell his dad some personal things before worrying that his father could actually hear him.
"I'm not going to tell him he's dying. That would be nasty. I was like, 'Dad, you know, I only wish that we could've bonded or---', Then I'm like, 'What the f*** am I doing?' This is his last day on Earth and I'm telling him that our relationship was basically a failure. All of a sudden, I'm a guy who communicates for a living, I couldn't communicate. I said, 'Where's the guy with the clarinet? BRING HIM BACK IN HERE.'"
Howard then added one final joke, "My dad died doing what he loved best, ignoring me. And I felt good that I could give him that moment."
"You have no idea how your father felt about you, let's say that," Robin said, trying to comfort Howard a bit.
"I know exactly how my father felt about me. You can 'say that'," Howard half-jokingly quipped back.