A family of ducks wandered into a grocery store and then hunkered down right next to junk food aisle.
You shouldn’t give bread to ducks. We all get told that from scientists and environmentalists, but nobody actually listens. And now we reap what we sow: a generation of ducks that are so hooked on carbs they’ve started taking up residence in local grocery stores.
In the wild, most ducks are omnivorous. The Mallard duck typically gets one-third of its calories from proteins and the remaining two thirds from plants. A wild Mallard might eat a few works, snack on a beetle or two, and then finish off their day with some light grazing or maybe an underwater tuber.
But just like with humans, that diet has been slowly shifting. Carbohydrates now play a larger role in the diet of urban ducks, with bread, rice, and pasta all getting tossed into local rivers and ponds for ducks to snack on. These calorie-dense foods are irresistible to waterfowl, who gobble them up without any thought to a balanced diet.
And now we have a problem. Ducks across the world are starting to associate people with a gravy train laden with a bready bite-sized banquet. When they don’t get that source of sweet sweet bread they start looking for it on their own.
Which leads us to this image taken of a family of Mallards in Japan. The mother knows that this is where humans get the good stuff, the best, most calorie-rich food imaginable: potato chips. She’s going to get her young ducklings hooked on the stuff at an early age, indoctrinating the next generation in their carb-filled world. And we are to blame.
Although this post has already received nearly 90,000 up-votes on Reddit, no one is discussing the terrible truth that this family faces: a hopeless addiction to carbs. All we get are responses helpfully interpreting the Japanese writing to mean "Rich Mango flavored popcorn" and "Spicy Cheese ridged potato chips".
What these ducks need is an intervention. And somebody to shoo them out of the junk food aisle and back to the fruits and vegetable aisle. Maybe the seafood section, if they can afford the price of salmon these days.