Heather Gay of Real Housewives of Salt Lake City appeared on the podcast You're Gonna Love Me with Katie Maloney. Both Bravo-lebrities are familiar with Mormonism, Gay more so than Maloney-Schwartz.

The owner of Beauty Lab & Laser discussed the tensions she has with her family after her divorce. According to her loved ones who grew up as Mormon, she's still married to her ex-husband.

'Living In Fear'

Gay described her time studying at BYU and being drawn to a life outside of the Mormon faith. She said the experience was like, "living in fear," as she didn't want to hurt her family.

Their faith kept them from letting go of her past relationship with ex Bret Engemann. Maloney-Schwartz asked if she ever wanted to throw her hands up and say, "f*ck y'all!"

"In a way I did," Gay shared, "I just retreated. It was pretty dark and lonely. It's like, you don't want to resent your family. Especially when they're reaching out in love but you know there's an edge to it."

heather gay mormon ex husband
Via: Page Six

She went on to talk about how this kind of behavior is common in traditional realms of the community, "It was interesting when Whitney talked about how it took six or seven years before she even had a wedding picture up at her in-laws' house."

Related: ‘RHOSLC’: Jen Shah Hints That Only Lisa Barlow Reached Out After Vegas

Understanding Family Complications

"I think people don't understand," Gay explained, "One, Mormons are uncomfortable with how to put the puzzle back together when it fractures. When it's not just a nuclear family that has a perfect life and goes off to Heaven."

According to her family, their traditional values calls the shots, "But our doctrine is eternal. So I am still, in the eyes of my religion and my family, married to Billy. We have a temple marriage and I do not have a temple divorce."

heather gay rhoslc mormonism
Via: Screen Rant

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It sounds like pain and feelings of rejection would bubble to the surface in a dynamic like that, but Gay still wants to approach her family with compassion.

"We will not be granted a temple divorce unless another man, " Gay continued into the complications of life after her divorce, "marries me in the temple. I have a Mormon choice or just Billy. Does that make sense, so I don't float off into space?"

Next: ‘RHOSLC’: Jen Shah Hints That Only Lisa Barlow Reached Out After Vegas