Lady Gaga is considered one of the most successful and versatile artists of this generation. However, her way to fame hasn't been easy.
The singer opened up about her devastating sexual assault and the effects that the tragic incident still has on her today.
Oprah Winfrey and Prince Harry's new docuseries The Me You Can't See just premiered on Apple TV. The new show gets real about mental health and is working towards removing the stigma surrounding mental illness.
In the first episodes of the series, Lady Gaga got candid about her post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), which was triggered by a sexual assault she experienced as a young artist in the industry.
She Is A Survivor Of A Terrible Act
Lady Gaga revealed, "a producer said to me, 'Take your clothes off.'" Then she continued to share, "And I said no. And I left, and they told me they were going to burn all my music. And they didn't stop asking me, and then I just froze and I just… I don't even remember."
Gaga did not feel comfortable sharing the name of her attacker, saying she doesn't want to face that person ever again. However, she opened up about how this trauma affected her.
Diagnosed with PTSD
Following the assault, Gaga said that she was diagnosed with PTSD years later after going to a hospital about chronic pain she was experiencing.
The artist revealed, "First, I felt full-on pain, then I went numb. Then I was sick for weeks and weeks and weeks and weeks after. I realized it was the same pain I felt when the person who raped me dropped me off pregnant on the corner, at my parents' house, because I was vomiting and sick. Because I'd been being abused, I was locked away in a studio for months."
The "Poker Face" singer explained that she became a different person because of the pains which eventually led to what she describes as a psychotic break, saying, "for a couple of years, I was not the same girl."
She even opened up about struggling with self-harm, explaining that it's a very real thing to "feel like there's a black cloud following you where you go telling you that you're worthless and should die. I used to scream and throw myself against the wall."
Sharing Her Self-Harm Experience
Gaga said that when it comes to self-harm the best is to tell somebody, not show somebody because, as she's learned, it doesn't help and makes you feel worse. The singer notes that healing and recovering is an ongoing process, revealing that she is still triggering today even if she has several months of being okay.
When talking about healing, she shared, "Everybody thinks [healing] is a straight line, that it's just like every other virus. That you get sick, and then you get cured. But it's not like that, it's just not like that."
Lady Gaga's Childhood
Lady Gaga's real name is Stefani Germanotta, and she was born in 1986 in Manhattan, New York City, to parents Joseph Germanotta and Cynthia Germanotta. She is of Italian and French Canadian heritage. Her mother is an internet entrepreneur, and she worked in telecommunications while her father is working in the hospitality industry. Later they would merge their experiences to pioneer the installation of wireless internet access to hotels worldwide.
Young Stefani and her younger sister Natali Veronica grew up in a happy household. But their parents were from lower-income and had worked their way up to get to where they were today. Their family was a loving one.
Born To Be a Star
Since she was a little girl, Stefani showed remarkable talent for the arts. Proof of this was that she started playing the piano when she was only four years old. On Christmas, her father gave her a song by Bruce Springsteen, and he said to her, "if you learn to play this song, we'll ask for a loan to buy a grand piano."
Gaga put in the work, and her family got her that piano when she was four years old. She practiced professionally and learned to play pieces up to 15 pages long before deciding to play music by ear rather than off paper.
By 13, she had written her first piano ballad, and by 14, she had her first performance in a New York City nightclub. Young Stefani pursued other forms of artistic expression: she would perform in school plays, took acting lessons, and went to many auditions. Although she was turned down many times, she did get a small role on The Sopranos.
Eating Disorders
Gaga was accepted into The Juilliard School in Manhattan, but instead, she attended the catholic institute Convent of the Sacred Heart. There she was picked on relentlessly because of her eccentric personality.
As a young girl, Gaga always stood out. In fact, her father gave her the nickname "Loopy." Unfortunately, amongst her peers, she was seen as a misfit and was often mocked.
This was a very dark time for the aspiring singer. She suffered from serious eating disorders, including bulimia and anorexia.
Taking Care of Her Mental Health
According to DNA India, the singer once stated that her first sexual experience was terrible, and she held onto her V card until she was 17. Sadly, a few years later, she would be sexually assaulted by a producer. There's no doubt of Gaga's resilience and inner strength. Not only is she a survivor but also a warrior that never gives up. Her story has touched many fans' and survivors' hearts.